Wild at heart

Love takes over

2010-05-15T22:03:00.001+03:00

Enlighted

2009-09-10T10:27:00.006+03:00

Finally realized my plan to start yoga that had been lingering at the back of my head for ten years. Just had a starter but errr.. wow. After the lesson I was rushed by wave of emotions and was crying of happiness, lucky it was dark!
The instructor (who happens to be a rather foxy Estonian girl radiating well-being and happiness) warned us "quite a many yogis have been hard core party people but given it all up after getting into yoga". Time will show.

"Sow a thought, reap an act. Sow an act, reap a habit. Sow a habit, reap a nature. Sow a nature, reap a destiny"

I'll be your one stop candy shop

2009-08-10T19:45:00.013+03:00

Vogue en concert in Helsinki, first time ever.

So had my birthday with Miss Ciccone. And 100.000 other people.
<rant>
Gosh I remember why I don't go to these mass concerts often! First of all Finns are so ice cool, no excitement or party spirit even Madonna is rocking the house!?! WTF? Why you come to concert wasting space if you just stand there like a fucking scarecrow? Second, two thirds of the people are just lame ass idiots, "wife forced me to come", "came with friends, drunk, because everybody is supposed to come", "I'm not watching, I'm filming the concert with my crappy mobile phone because I can", "I liked her when she released Holiday".. And ban for everybody over six feet or coming with a frickin bagpack!!!
</rant>

Well to admit I was a bit disappointed. Haven't seen her live before but the DVD's of previous concerts & other artists beat Sticky&Sweet. Maybe Hard Candy isn't that good album either.. Problem is she's got so wide spectrum from her long career it's not easy to keep it tightly packed. Ok she did it by mostly playing new songs & remixes of oldies. Second problem, modern heavily mixed songs don't work that well on an open air 100.000 people concert, and Hard Candy doesn't really have great hits. Anyhow went there, saw her.

Birthday with Madonna

2009-08-06T00:42:00.003+03:00

Will be having my birthday today at Mad's concert in Helsinki.

Yeah the nails dropped off so I'll report Sparkle, promise.

Waiting for my nails to fall off

2009-07-14T13:08:00.002+03:00

Writing with these nails is such a pain I'll wait them to fall off before reporting Sparkle. Flew to Manchester, got drunk, had fun. Simples as they say.

Sparkles!

2009-07-11T15:02:00.000+03:00

I'm at Sparkle. Come say hi!

Situation: Normal, all f...

2009-07-05T23:16:00.005+03:00

HEL- MAN - HEL tickets - check
The Place, 4 nights, 2 bedrooms - check
Tattoo session booked - check
Hairdresser & extensions booked - check
Gel nails booked - check
Write report about 1) Helsinki Burlesque where I went with skimpy PVC sailor outfit 2) DTM foam party I went in bikinis and err.. 3) Helsinki Pride, again in bikinis etc - mmm is there any more red left?

I'm still looking for a reporter to follow me to cover the adventures! Volunteers?

Hey, I'm on holiday. Yay!

PS: Jo, I so will bring you rollmops!
PS2: ...and I promised Jo to take it easy. Watch this space as they say!

Survival

2009-06-29T00:16:00.003+03:00

All I can say is Phew, I survived my 3 weeks partygirl marathon and Pride which just finished yesterday with parade, picnic and parties. I'll write some proper report of this hectic week later but now just a quickie before going to sleep. Today I've been mostly carrying things around as I have new flat. Further away from DTM so I will not die of alcohol & dancing overdose and/or sleep deprivation ;) After 6 hours I need to wake up and get my honeybunny from the airport, she comes back to Finland. Crazy days are over, for the moment!

Vally soo ballyhoo

2009-06-14T10:49:00.009+03:00

I know I've promised a zillion times I'll write about my adventures but but.. Mostly it just ends up in a short FB status message, an occasional flickr pic and some comment in Puuteri forum. As I have a Sunday morning lie-in I try to catch up on this week.

Thursday we hooked up ad-hoc with Patricia to go out. She's very nice but I've never had opportunity to go just two of us. Program was special because we stuck to normal bars! First to Baker's for their night starter special, 1e for glass of sparkling happy hour. That's my place! We managed to destroy several bottles' worth of the material. Then to one of Helsinki's most famous bars, Hotel Torni Ateljee Bar! Tiny panorama bar over the rooftops of Helsinki with special toilets: windows without any curtains opening over Helsinki. Had some glasses of sparkling there too and of course visited the ladies'.. Then erm.. we visited some more bars all around town before ending up in Kaarle XIII for the rest of the night. That's extreme I tell you, it's a place (especially on Thursday) for office people to party hard and look for one night stands. We fit there actually very well and had a blast. I'm afraid I did a crazy show again, judging from all the bruises and aching the morning after. Going home some man joined me and tried to talk me into having some intimate sessions. But as he was a bit worried if I'm really really a woman I politely told him to go to hell. What a blast, need to go more to mainstream bars!

Friday morning wasn't so much of a blast, I needed to go to work and I was simply dead (and thoroughly marinated) meat. Ouch.

Yesterday switched mode and had a huge dance party. I'll spare details for identity protection but let me just say it hell feels nice to still after some years be #1 dancer in country (in a certain subculture natch)..

Now waiting for tonight's burlesque party Helsinki to Honolulu via Hysteria. Should be grrrreat party - on a ship - with shipload of US performers, including Diamond Daggers, a queer vaudeville show group. I'm gonna make a bold move and wear my pvc sailor outfit from Amsterdam that covers about as much as a napkin of my body. That's why I've been running 10km sets and eating mostly salad this week ;) Pics will be delivered later. Helsinki Burlesque organisers Bettie and Kiki are the most awesome and lovely pair of ladies and they just love us tgirls coming to their parties.

Only problem is I'm not sure what shoes to wear, maybe I need to go look around shops today. My honey tries to point out I've got already hundreds at home (that's true, actually) but she doesn't really understand this shoe-thing. Every occasion needs it's own shoes and I'm definitely lacking pin up sailor pumps!

Some of these days I'm going to take a break from partying, but next weekend is midsummer fiesta and I'm organising girly party at my place, then next weekend is Helsinki Pride and I'm organising picnic in the park plus evening party to go and then Sparkle is around the corner..

Somebody give me second life.

Dress Sense

2009-06-03T01:46:00.007+03:00

Fun to be in UK after almost two years. Two most peculiar things that make me feel like home: totally impractical, unusable taps (how many centuries to get them working?) and the girls' uberminiskirts downtown. My dress sense is out of scale in Helsinki but hey, nobody probably would notice me in UK.

I'm weighing if I'll be bovvered enough to put slap on and take the train tomorrow night to Paddington and do some wondering around town & maybe Trannyshack. Forecast for Thursday morning: very very painful headache plus the train tickets seem to be a pain in butt. Decisions decisions.. Small girl all alone in big town ;)

Reading Trannies

2009-05-19T16:09:00.002+03:00

I'll be in Reading June 1-5. Any suggestions? Do they read trannies in Reading? Maybe I'll jump a train to Paddington and hit the big town.. Give me a shout if you're around.

ESC 2009

2009-05-16T19:41:00.060+03:00

19.45 EET

Four bottles of Cabernet Syrah - check.
Barbeque - check.
Sauna warming up - check.

All ready for tonight's Eurovision finals, watch this space for live coverage. Unfortunately my country house phone line seems to be dead so I'm hanging on mobile gprs connection..

While waiting, watch Swedish impression of Russians - I lol'd when I saw the Russian ESC show, it was just the same sans dancing bear.

22.00 EET On Air!
Cirque Du Soleil show is nice
So they've changed to 50% jury voting as they've noticed people vote for neighbouring countries - Balkans win anyone? 20 mini-nations...

Dima Bilal?!? Impressive entre!
His last year performance was very weird, I don't understand how he win - blame Balkans..

New hosts are much better! The semifinals bloke-host was an idiot.

Lithuania: Nice country I've visited for business many times - I like! A bit unconventional from the ubermacho ex-SSSR state with a taste of lgbt hatred.

Israel
Suspected to get into finals by jury votes. Boring song, bring me Dana International!

France
Ooh Patricia Kaas! It doesn't matter what happens in ESC, she's too big for it! Subtitles for the uncivilized of us ;) How nice of her to give her divine aura for earthly ESC - what a dramatic performance!!!

Sweden!
Beloved neighbour! What a strong blonde amazon! Nightwish style opera-singing.. I just might give my vote for SE..

Croatia
Balkan style ubermacho stuff with male lead singer and number of female singers picked based on their outlook - wife comments "oh handsome!" - daah... "Holy Beauty"... Oh yeah... Not impressed. What? He sing about Tena?!? That's an adult diaper!!!

Portugal
I love the country and culture but the song and band is funny! They have so much groovy styles why they don't use them? But all respect goes to relying on traditional style. Not many countries have the history to do that..

Iceland
Island of fairytales - never visited but plan for long time. Mira mira.. Geysirs and ponies. 18-year singer does her best to present the exotic country. Nice in overall, but that's not enough we know, don't we?

Greece
Greek god Sakis. Greeks like to party! First proper party song :) LGBT points delivered, definitely! This is our night! Nice show but a bit lacking from winner performance. Ok Greek trip booked for this summer.

Armenia
Core Europe singing. Why they say Armenia is always a sure bet for ESC finals? Why do we have these countries in ESC!?! After 5 years we have China and Thailand participating.

Russia
WTF, she is from Ukraine. Why she presents Russia? Slavic sad love ballad. No fear they win this year ;)

Azerbaijan
He live in Sweden since 10 - Azer or Swedish? Nice duo and song, but not really winner potential. Sorry Marina ;).

Bosnia - Herzegovina
Balkan ballad - seen that, heard that. Next. I do remember drinking a lot of tequila in Bulgaria and getting numerous new best friends from the Balkans - but their songs suck!

Moldova
Arab style explosion one more time... OMG. Come see my country, come see our traditional dance style. I respect cultures and originality but IS ESC place for that?!?!

Malta
An island easily forgotten at the Mediterranean. What's nice and funny about ESC you get to be reminded of all the UN recognized states from Europe to the Eurasian.. Andorra being my favourite ;) Anyhoo Malta is standard pompouse ballad, see you next year.

Estonia
Beloved southern cousins. They almost speak the same language. Only country to so such a wise move. Nice female band, and singing in Estonian! Props. Nice stuff, but too peaceful for ESC?

Denmark
Ooooh Nordic cousins. Had Drag Queen last year or the one before. Props! Standard ESC song about love. Nice. Doesn't impress me though, much.

Germany
Evermost best-looking and groovy German I've ever seen! What a pity it's just 20% of hotness of official video. Do check it out! Unfortunately live performace will disappear in history...

Turkey
Standard Turk show with belly dancing, Arab sounds and shouting. Winner stuff for ESC, naturally. Not impressed, sorry.

Albania
Geography classes taught Albania is the most disadvanteged country in Europe, communist state with bunkers and donkeys. They seem to have advanced, at least in regard of synthesizer music.

Norja
From Russia originally.. Hmm... WTF?!? OMG and they thought this fun stuff will win?

Ukraine
Be my valentine. Good Show! Looks like Ukrainians can make a party :) Maybe I should go there for a visit ;)

Romania
Props for use of samba-beat. Singing not so impressive. Grrrrrrl power.

UK
Lloyd Webber aye! Tough stage for her as UK do awful every year. She is very very nice. About song I'm not so sure. And I was listening to Cats LP's since 10... Too simple song if you ask me: "Itäs my time" : ad infinitum...

Finland
Finland!!!! Vote for us!!!! I don't want to lose control.
Simple eurodance but NATCH it should win!!!

Spain
Nice dress and sexy song. Is it enough? Mixed Spanish and English. Hawt.

23.50 EET TIME FOR VOTING!!!
Haha Russian commentary from MIR: Asian comment: "They like to show power" - indeed.
Ayayayayayayayayayayayyayayayayayayayayayayayaaaaaaaaa...

Fuerza Bruta
I love these Cirque shows.. What an ingenious pool show! How nice from Chile!

WINNER IS..
How come Norway get winning points? Cannot get it..
WTF Sweden voting only 4 points for Finland? And I voted for Sweden.. But what is it really about Norway?!? It's not really an ESC song. Norway and Turkey leading oh yeah...

Norwegians are nice but their '09 ESC song is crap! What kind of people vote for them?

Norwegian win is a fact but mystery. Asian opinion is "they vote for gasoline". Congrats To Norway, see you in Oslo next year. Wine finished, over and out!

Alive and kicking

2009-05-14T17:50:00.007+03:00

Maybe I should write something to prove I'm still alive.

Kind of hard to decide what to write about, lot's of things happening all the time. Life is good. Admitted, also Facebook is eating the urge, so much easier to just write a single comment to FB than sit down and come up with a blog post worth reading (and writing).

Did something new today: UFF second hand clothes shop has everything for 2 euros and we went with Tita & our spouses to check out. Not so much my style of shopping but actually I was very happy with the bag of finds I ended up with: very nice jeans, shirts and cool tartan skirt. My style, ok quality at 5% price. Wowsers. Maybe I start to visit those shops more, helps in keeping up two wardrobes.

Yesterday I went to DTM (again) with Tita & her crazy-lovely gf and some other friends. The 15e sparkling bottles made time fly and all of sudden it was 4am closing time. Why this happens to me always? Wednesdays and Sundays are quite nice though quietish because the primetime "hey let's go to see a gay bar" idiot turists don't bother. Curses of a successful gay bar..

Eurovision fever is rising with finals in Moscow on Saturday. Finland's Waldo is in finals, yay! Don't forget to vote them! :) DTM has been having special nights with all the semifinals, for some reason lgbt folk love ESC. Gonna be interesting to see how the planned Moscow Pride will go. If the Russian "Omon" special forces think of sabotaging it, they should look into mirror!

Btw, I'm coming to Sparkle, and might visit UK in June as well. Yay!

Twitter 2.0

2009-04-28T19:04:00.002+03:00

Before continuing with other things, let me continue previous theme with an unashamed copy from my friend Joanna's blog..

After Twitter, here's Flutter!

Sorry & thanks Jo for this brilliant piece.

Social network congestion: why less is more

2009-02-26T10:31:00.014+02:00

Flickr and Facebook have gone from hot to not. Does somebody still really use MySpaces? Twitter/Jaiku whatever really looks hot but they're just bollocks, a new momentarily adrenaline dose for the tired.

Social networking works when the network is small and smart. The moment it grows unmanageable to limits of human cognition (what do you really do with 2.359 contacts?!? Can you remember your common history with no. 1.703?) and quality plummets below mediocre all the networking effect wears off.

Flickr was cool when there was just trannyflickr with Miss K and Erika Baarova (ok perhaps a couple others too :), and it was a privilege to join. Now every picture gets ten invites "Add to my 'Blondes wearing pink lipstick and high heels while sitting on sofa' -group!".

I've read bright opinions how all this false "being connected 24/7 and having hundreds of friends all over the world" is actually worsening the quality of our social lives and more importantly prevents us to focus on anything, be it work, family, hobby, or a real social life. I strongly believe in the referenced fact that being good in anything requires long-spanning concentration more than anything. Would we have the relativity theories if Einsten Twittered his daily minutes of life? I give you Kathy Sierra, I really recommend reading it. And she wrote it two years ago!

"Coffee with your next-door neighbor could do more for your brain than a thousand Twitter updates."

To prove my point, take a look at this monster. Inspiration for this post and a picture from www.ping.fm that enables you to send your status messages from web/mobile/social sites to all the major social networking sites. God bless us from the minor.

I'll go make a coffee and concentrate on my work.

On British blue eyes

2009-02-26T10:03:00.007+02:00

According to a recent study 80% of Brits have blue eyes. Now that is news, at least to me! The rest of you probably knew it already?

Admitting being wrong is a sign of strength ;)

And when did Lady J change to a Pink Fluffy Duck?!?

Momentary lapse of reason

2009-02-20T01:16:00.006+02:00

It's 1am, disco is open until 4am and it's all inclusive aka booze for free. And I'm back to room. Writing blog entry. Am I getting sensible or old? Or both?!?

I found out Turkey - based on a court decision - is banning Youtube because some Greek people have posted anti-Turkish material. Cool. I didn't say it to my Turkish colleagues, but really, is your nation planning to join EU? Are you sure you are ready for it? We have some concepts like human rights and freedom of speech that you might not be familiar with. Yet.

Personally I've always detested these all-inclusive luxury resorts and now I'm sure. Come on, a concentration camp without any outside people. Suicide. MIA. The German pensioners really don't know how to have fun.

Walk like a Brit

2009-02-19T03:06:00.008+02:00

Jo, Becky, Mom!

All the Germans and French think I'm British.
What went wrong? Brits don't have blue eyes. Cake or death?!?

On Turkish specials

2009-02-19T02:25:00.015+02:00

I will never ever ask a Turkish bartender for his special drink. Did that x N (don't remember anything about the night) and got everything destroyed. I say, I throw up very very very seldom, but now I did it all day. And I was still drunk 18 hours after finishing the last drink. Is that possible really?!?
It's next night and surprisingly everybody thinks I'm British + wasted = over + out.
Hey it's just me. Val.

Bloody Turkish ISPs have blocked Youtube ?!?

PS: you have no idea amount of concentration went for this blog entry! I had about 20 mojitos and a half tonight...

Back in business

2009-02-15T21:45:00.002+02:00

Spending a working week in five star resort in southern Europe. Today I realised just how much I've been missing traveling. I'll put down some of my thoughts later, now I'm too busy destroying the minibar, next diving to foam bath.

Dial B for Burlesque

2009-02-07T11:18:00.003+02:00

It's the D-Day for Helsinki Burlesque Festival and I've organised a day for around 20 people. Tita just came to my place and we'll start preparing. First some shopping around town & some business visits, on evening we have dinner gathering and finally the actual burlesque party. I've been waiting for this, finally here!

And oh, yesterday I remade my gel nails with proper tips. Oooh they are wonderful!

Inside/Outside

2009-01-30T17:10:00.006+02:00

Just retreated for a relaxing weekend at countryside and then DTM (manager who just got a new boyfriend and is utterly happy) announces they have tomorrow special night w/ sparkling wine 10e/bottle!?! Decisions, decisions. Missing today already Helsinki Burlesque goes Hehku (lebian girls monthly club).

I trashed myself last weekend totally, twice. Destroying a pair of high heel boots included. Is the capability to warm up while making up with 12 cosmopolitans an asset or liability? It surely is liability after entering the bar as my bills are always awesome. Problem is, after gaining speed there are no limits, I just keep going like duracel.

Anyhoo I think I had some point when I started writing (before all the glasses of red)..

I just had artificial gel nails done today. Nice and actually totally natural as I didn't take any extra length. Now I'll just sit and watch them growing naturally. I've been wondering the eternal issue of "advanced" CD's over and over again. It would be easy to be firmly on either side of the fence, but balancing the act in-between is a difficult job to do. For most of society you need to present yourself as normal, keeping up a perfectly satisfying heterosexual relationship but then in meantime present your feminine side and do it good. Going forward with plucked brows, full-body shaving, artificial nails, ear (and other) piercings, lasering beard etc inevitably makes your appearance more and more feminine. Entering no-man's land where your old mates just might start talking behind your back. Where you start to wonder if you want to hang around with the old any more.. I haven't faced anything but I'm well aware of the fact that my outlook is lingering the border of.. non-conventional. And the problem is I've only started! I'd love to do many many more things. But still I'd like to repair my 4x4 and go hunting. On surface it looks like modern society is accepting about sex roles, but when it comes to a man with good dress sense, high heels, artificial nails, and arguing about transmission overhaul.. Not really.

Lady Gaga: Poker Face

PS: the title is a theme of this week's biggest job assignment: World's #1 consulting we-know-everything organisation is calling me all the time being lost how to create a certain architecture. Aaaargh. Talk about balancing act between knowing all the details of enterprise IT architecture and smoke eye makeup techniques. And more. *sigh*

I die after every party

2009-01-26T18:59:00.005+02:00

I will never again get trashed night before I need to work in the morning. I will never again get trashed night before I need to work in the morning. I will never again get trashed night before I need to work in the morning. I will never again get trashed night before I need to work in the morning. I will never again get trashed night before I need to work in the morning. I will never again get trashed night before I need to work in the morning. I will never again get trashed night before I need to work in the morning. I will never again get trashed night before I need to work in the morning. I will never again get trashed night before I need to work in the morning. I will never again get trashed night before I need to work in the morning.

Had sushi & champagne housewarming yesterday and went out to DTM snuggle Sunday. Enough said?

Real time

2009-01-23T18:57:00.029+02:00

19.00
Yay! It's happening again. You remember what happened last time? It's Cosmo #3 going and it ain't gonna finish anytime soon..
19.12
Epilator is the devil's revenge for women!
But I try to switch for that as razor shaving makes my legs go all blisters, looking I have like plague or something...
19.13
Frickiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin hurts! 4 days growth makes me suffer seriously! I think I need Cosmo #4!
19.25
We have a winner! At worst moments I was concentrating on Khmer Rouge concentration camps and repeating "Pain is only my imagination". First prize: Cosmo #5
19.37
So we were supposed to hit town with Timi but she couldn't come. Now I have full party stock all to my own. Or actually, had. Let's see tomorrow if anything's left.. My 2008 DTM vip expired, let's see if I get new one tonight. Yes I haven't been out for ages!!!
19.47
We have reached cruising altitude: alcometer says 1.1%%
20.00
There's a new LGBT bar in town called Feeniks!?! Need to go check it sometime.
20.29
-> shower
20.46
Cosmo #6
21.12
Ready for make-up but hey, nobody's downtown before 23 so what's the hurry? Cosmo #7 and Ministry of Sound. I usually take shower, shave, dress, and only dressed start to do make up. Also practical as it would be inconvenient dress up with all slap on. I'm not bothering about my nails as they are all fucked up anyway. I will go next week to have gel artificial nails *promise*
21.23
Alcometer is all "HI" meaning > 2%% after cosmo #7 - but hey machines lie anyway (see Eddie Izzard)
21.49
Cosmo #8 - btw I'm not just sitting and getting berusad, I'm chatting in Puuteri and Facebook - busy!
21.59
Valerie's "I iz cheapo" lip-tip: Asian tiger palm. It contains cajuput, cinnamon & clover oil - guaranteed to make your lips swollen = fuller :P PS: I just invented that myself!
22.08
Honey is dressing & making up, I'm having Cosmo #9 + chatting + partying (Kelly Rowland: Work [Freemasons Remix])
22.25
Cosmo #10 & Armin van Buuren : Imagine!
23.05
I'm made up! So beautifuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuul!
23.06
Cosmo #11
03:00
Back home
03.08
Is it ok if I just die?
10.12 am
Just woke up. Had a fun night out but surprisingly quiet at DTM yesterday - that's why we finished before closing time. Very very easy nowadays to go there as I have a flat just three blocks away. No more suffering in taxi queue or arguing who's the designated driver. Now smoothing music, tomato juice and hot bath in candle light with my honey baby, later off to country house for total relaxation and sauna. Tomorrow we'll host a kind of house-warming party here for friends and go for DTM snuggle Sunday. Over and out!

-*- Cosmopolitan -*-
1.5 cl Triple Sec(Cointreau)
1 cl Lime juice (sweet)
3 cl Cranberry juice
2.5 cl Vodka

Buggr

2008-12-29T14:43:00.006+02:00

My today's Flickr stats: 1.010 call me a contact, 500.000+ views on my pics, 670 unread mail.

1.010 contact viewers and nobody to sponsor me a pro account, which I've been observing after mine expired a few months ago ;) (And no, if you're intelligent enough to read my blog I don't want you to sponsor it!!!)

Instead of aiming for the magical million views milestone I think I'll scale down. Actually a million views shouldn't be too difficult nowadays. Flickr is hugely popular, just post whatever (especially x-rated whatever) on continuous fire and post it to as many pools as you can, et voilá just in a month and a half.

Flickr was essential in my coming out years ago, a sudden paradise island of quality trannies forming a community. Now it's the Manila waste dump where one can occasionally find something nice. To advance the message of Tranny Freedom and Fun I took the task of documenting - okay, at least trying to! - my whereabouts in a diary format (ok, a byproduct of selfishly posting my pictures all over and get masses of fans calling "Amazing!", "You're so beautiful!", "urhot got msn?"). Now I think I've done my part. Maybe I'll change it to a portfolio of my best portraits. Maybe I'll even set up my pro photo studio gear and take a few shots.

Actually taking a more closed look at photography again could be interesting. I still haven't read the manual of my Nikon D200 I bought over two years ago! I used to teach photography and b/w printing at my University...

If teh internets is all about peer content creation while majority of net users anyway still are consumer couch potatoes, why do the artists need to pay the bill?

Another annoying thing btw is if I wanted to put my huge amount of boy-pictures online I should buy another account. Why not be able to have a single repository of content and then being able to publish different views for different audiences?

Sorry Flickr but I'll add to global downturn and not renew my pro account. Which btw has gotten more expensive during the years. I always thought there are economies of scale in teh nets?

Valerie's 1st theorem of web 2.0 : as the user base of a social content sharing web site grows big enough to support actual business model, the original content- and community creating core users start to get fed up.

Happy Holidays!

2008-12-25T15:45:00.002+02:00

Slightly belated Happy Christmas time to all!!!

In 2008 many things have been going on all the time, lots of changes in my life (again) but 2009 theme looks like building stability. Maybe I'll be able to write more often and keep in touch with all you friends better. *muah*

(Today, I've been mostly lying in bed with fever. Doh.)

I'm gonna start the fight?

2008-12-23T22:30:00.002+02:00

Why is it that everybody describes me with this link: Pink: So What

Googlestorming

2008-12-23T19:26:00.006+02:00

Ha! I'll just write this funny googlestorming instead of putting any of my real thoughts down:

Got utterly annoyed reading Cross Dresser #1 the Pope himself, God's chosen Man in a Dress declaring fight against homo- and transexuality is as important as protection of the environment.
While googling around for a humour picture of Pope dressing in a cross aka cross-dressing for my forum post I came up with a seemingly interesting blog by a 20sh Helsinki girl. Haha she's the same ice queen I've met several times in DTM whos head-in-the-arse "I must be the most handsome hetero in the bar" boyfriend is groping my wife's arse (and surely others') at every possibly chance. Last time I got enough and was going to make an issue but my beloved wife changed her mind that something had happened so I was left without evidence.

Arse.

I so hate those types coming to gay bars and 1) thinking they can behave like they were in their regular hilly-billy pub 2) totally incapable of even imagining a heterosexual tranny, and yes, that gorgeous girl you're fancying is actually with him, and thank you, go back were you crawled out from! Well we've had several hilarious nights observing that self-conscious couple making such a loser joke out of themselves it's almost ok.

Noble

2008-12-11T18:47:00.004+02:00

Finland got yesterday it's 3rd Nobel Prize as our ex-president Martti Ahtisaari received the 2008 Nobel Prize for Peace in Oslo. I feel happy and proud for that. He is propably the most underestimated Finn ever, my (previous) opinions included. When he was president we had plenty of jokes like "Ahtisaari is the only president you can see from Moon" - let's face it, he is huge and not the most handsome of world politicians. He came outside party circles as a black horse and won elections big time. He was claimed to be populist, disregarding our country and inclining to business as he spent much time traveling around world doing international politics and promoting Finnish companies. Disregard for home field ultimately hit him as his party came up with another candidate for next elections. Rumour goes he got fed up with this and thus decided not to continue as a president. Good for the rest of the world I say, as he has worked tremendously for solving crisis around world.
It's funny how Russia is very sour of his prize, no official recognizion so far and all main papers just barking bullshit critic. They are still sour about Balkans where Ahtisaari helped produce a plan for the indepence of Kosovo from (Russian ally) Serbia. Today's Pravda: "When the Finns blocked his second presidency, they probably were spared of sharing fate of rest of the world caused by Mr. Ahtisaari."
Err WTF? Attack of Russia? Putin will nuke the world because Norwegians gave Nobel to him? Balkans taught me a Russian lesson, we almost ended up boxing with my then-best cordial Russian friend about the issue. A Ph.D. ready to take Kalashnikov and fight for the Nato oppression there, nothing else ever happened, just American propaganda. I'm actually worried about Russia because the country has gone only much worse ever since when it comes to democracy.

Imagine

Today I'm surrounded by a military camp. This morning getting out of my house to work a sergeant with attack riffle stopped me "Sorry Sir (sic!) road is closed, there's a mine field. You need to turn and go other way." Now how often does your day start like this? Ultimately they gave in and I got to go to work. I'm terribly afraid the reality of their training suffered from pulling off the enormous mine-sweeping truck and watching as a bloody civilian coupé sped right through their minefield. Hey, it's my road, get off or I will drive into your camouflage tent.
Or worse, put my military uniform and attack you tonight! :P

Circus

2008-12-05T22:42:00.003+02:00

There's only two types of people in the world
The ones that entertain, and the ones that observe
Well baby, I'm a put-on-a-show kind of girl
Don't like the backseat
Gotta be first
(Oh..)

I'm a like the ringleader, I call the shots (Call the shots)
I'm like a firecracker, I make it hot
When I put on a show...

Went with Tita to Britney's Circus album release party on Wednesday. On circus theme there were magicians and girls on five feet legs around. Got free CD & poster. Party was actually pretty lame but had fun anyway. I felt we were about only ones dressed for the occasion (plus a bunch of girlies dressed as Britneys, we instantly clicked!). Got a weirdo fan trying to pick up, summoned staff to throw him out. Also very very by chance met Rach from UK, nice to see you & get in touch if you ever come again to the cold LGBT capital of Nordics!

Many many things have happened but I haven't written anything. I'll try to be nicer and catch up. I'm feeling happy!

Britney: Circus

I feel the adrenaline moving through my veins
Spotlight on me and I'm ready to break
I'm like a performer, the dancefloor is my stage
Better be ready, hope that you feel the same

All eyes on me, in the center of the ring
(Just like a Circus) (Uh. Uh.Uh-huh)
When I crack that whip, everybody gonna trip
(Just like a Circus) (Uh. Uh. Uh-huh)
Don't stand there watching me, follow me, show me what you can do
Everybody let go, we can make a dancefloor
(Just like a Circus) (Uh. Uh. Uh-huh)

Sense and Sensibility

2008-11-03T19:46:00.010+02:00

Had a sparkling Halloween party in a good company.

We closed down Puuteri for 3 days to educate the Delta Tau Chis about internet forum behaviour, clean the place a little bit and simply, to have a perfect Halloween holiday :)

We started receiving plenty of feedback and remarkably, 100% supportive and approving. Talk about taking the right move. Also last night on going back online everybody was happy for us coming back. Thanks everybody for support.

Looking back my mistake has been trying to get along with everybody and being active on the forum on day-to-day discussions. Therefore I tried to deal the issue on personal relations, not just cold implementation of rules. Lesson learned. I also re-found Becky's old gem: Envérité's version of Godwin's Law and started implementing that :P

What's funny, local people seem to have started reading my blog. Obviously somebody's been sending a link. I've never advertised it to anyone and consider it my semi-private diary where I'm for instance ranting about the idiots social challenges I come across and then be able to continue with the requirements of a civilized society.

Looks like some people have been bruised by my previous post. First of all, it's truth. Truth needs to be told when too many people believe lies. Truth screams to be told when lies try to replace truth publicly. Second, if somebody acts like an idiot she must face being called one. I can apologize my rant to one person, H, because she apologized me for her part of the mess. Otherwise, it's been very quiet so I count having 5-1 lead.

Time to move on. Case closed.

Evil Evil Evil: On hatstands and fruitcakes

2008-10-28T19:27:00.028+02:00

13 months ago I set up transgender website puuteri.org with the idea of bringing all transgender people together in fun and accepting environment. It has been popular with around 500 users and 5.000 posts to date, 20+ online chatters every night. (for a language audience of 5 million people).

I'm considering to close it down.

For the past 13 months I can count with single hand fingers people who've thanked me for the site. Currently more people mock me on daily basis for whatever reason they can find.

Want the script of a drama featuring cheaper back-stabbing liars and retards than the novel at local Tesco's?

Hardly a surprise that all the characters are pre-transition m2f TSes, many of whom got their first bite of Zumenon last week. (I'm refering to them according to sex stated in their passport - just returning the favour of being called names for over a week now)

Shame shame as some of my loveliest friends are TSes. But then again, my friends don't have serious mental problems.

It all started with a discussion on transvestite part of the forum, topic "Transvestite ICD classification" sliding gradually to off-topic mostly by some besserwissers wanting to tell How Things Are, as usual. We knew what was on the road ahead and decided to act on it.

A newbie hatstand J started explaining the standard wisdom "You are like having a hobby, like doing yoga, a lifestyle choice. The choice of wearing a skirt is like somebody want to use a suit, some others jeans. [...] I on the other hand am a Real Woman feeling and thinking like a woman, not any (transvestite) ass-shaker from bar".

He got private warning for putting that blurp public.

Simultaneously on the same discussion fruitcake H was posting pages of data on transexual treatment. Everything started sliding off-topic, so fellow moderator Tita wrote a general reminder to everyone "Please stop posting off-topic". The fruitcake heated, threw personal insult, and went on.

He got private warning for writing that insult and disrespecting moderation.

But now he started revving. He started calling us names, "blokes in a dress", boys with inflated ego, ts-haters, asking to ban him, and writing some strange scorny forum articles. We didn't care so far and told him to calm down and relax, nobody's interested in banning him. I contacted him and tried to talk the case clear, actually believing we did reach an understanding. How wrong I was. He continued, and got the hatstand J along. Now we had two persons looking for trouble and challenging moderation.

I put the newbie for a 3 day ban, and asked the more mature H once more to get real. After hearing of the ban the fruits flew all over the place: he continued insults and started writing articles that every TS should get off the site as it's run by ts-hating blokes in a dress. Enough of that so he got a 7 day ban. The website aims to bring together TSes and TVs, so the TS/TV war he started mongering was attacking the core idea of the site.

Result was that a public anonymous transforum, regularly full of tranny-haters and bashing, started to fill of insults on the website and us administrators. Mostly insulting poor Tita who wasn't even to blame! Part of messages were signed by H himself, but most of it anonymous. Very, very low class insults.

Random hatstands started making trouble on our website. A grandma-aged nutcake J, specialized in generating hot air, was every day claiming admin of bashing ts's and general bad behaviour. He who himself blew off personal insults on a priest one of the same days for christ's sake! A true hatstand supreme M who's usually writing stuff nobody can really understand was generating bad atmosphere as well, claiming all the time that TSs are randomly banned because we hate TSes and that we are just bunch of kids stretching our muscle, but "we will all be killed my stronger force".. Explaining dutifuly in chat to everybody how things are, even he had no idea what had happened. J, a weekly visitor with sour one-liners and insults started celebrating that finally we are getting what we deserve.

O.M.G.

Despite all this pile of shit mounting and even moderate TSes starting to jump this imaginative bandwagon to "resist the oppressors" we cut the original bans on predetermined days. Last night I caught H in chat and after some insisting got him to talk about the episode, and got an apology. So we are ok. Also J agreed episode was over. End of story? Not! The wheels H set into motion keep turning.

While talking this M was simultaneously mocking of power politics, childish abuse and demanding for a apology for him. Excuse me? He's not involved in the row in any other way than spreading lies, insulting, general bad will, and he even admitted writing many of the anonymous insults on the other website. And now he's waiting for an apology? I shrugged that off at the time, but this morning seeing that random hatstands are still continuing the mockery, my cup was filled and spilled.

My site is an attempt to find intelligent, nice transgender people in Finland who can discuss and share thoughts without scorn, need for self-promotion on others' expense or purge personal anxiety on insulting others. If none exist, the social experiment failed. End of story.

I'm most disappointed about two things: First seeing that some TSes I thought were my friends have been nodding acceptingly to this pile of shit mounting because of the claimed oppression of TSes - and they happily believed those lies. Second, that no-one of the presumed intelligent, nice persons among the wider audience are standing up to voice that this is wrongness. How can a handful of troublemakers abuse a vast majority of users, however edgy and noisy they be? That leaves me with two conclusions: either I'm wrong or alone. Both cases, I'm seriously considering giving it all up and continuing with nicer things in life.

I'm afraid I'm in desperate need of relocating to a country with citizens equipped with social skills and more positive life attitude.

It's been a while.. I know I shouldn't have kept you waiting, but I'm here now

PS: Administering the forum has consumed virtually all my t*net quota, haven't been reading anybody's blogs or writing/posting pics for ages. Wonder if the same people are still around LOL.

Interlude

2008-08-31T02:18:00.003+03:00

Umm, I'm not dead - again - but just having a blog-death. Uuh I promise I mayhaps topped Extreme Trannying FOREVER last weekend at the night of the (t)arts.. maybe I'll report more later, maybe not. Lucky I didn't end up in jail for the night ;) What else? Puuteri has over 400 users / 3.500 posts. Whoa.

I'm having a serious mid-tranny-crisis: after you've partied several capitals, several spouses, several genres - what next? Well obviously I haven't done everything as I'm planning a trip to Barca with friends.

September: Cry For You (2008)

Search engine bigotry

2008-07-24T15:02:00.011+03:00

Just how deluded can somebody be?

I am an admin for a Finnish TG discussion forum, and one thread is recommendations about good webshops for clothes shopping. The forum is strongly moderated family safe, no questionable content. I recently got this email:

Dear Webmaster

We have discovered that you are linking to our website, www.fancydress.com, on the following URLs: http://www.puuteri.org/keskustelu ... (several links to the thread)

Please would you remove the links to our website. Will you please confirm by email that you have received this email and the links have been removed.

Kind regards,
Jeremy

First I thought just to ignore this nonsense, but I was too intrigued and replied:

Dear Jeremy,

I'd be utterly interested to hear an explanation for such a strange contact?

You've set up a web site and search for anybody linking there, and wish you are not mentioned or linked by anybody? I've been working with the web since the first web browser in 1993, and never met anybody (outside China) with your interest.

with regards and uttermost interest,
Valerie

Now the thing is getting interesting:

Hi Valerie,
We're currently in the process of optimization (SEO) and as part of this are removing all links to our site that are damaging our ranking. Sadly yours were doing this, so I have to ask you to remove them.
Many thanks,

Jeremy

So excuse me? You have hired some hulabalooba SEO optimizer consultant / read a 5c book on the topic, and decided people discussing about your shop in some discussion forum (in a language totally foreign to you) is degrading you?
And, as a solution, you decide to send a polite email asking to remove the link, i.e. remove the discussion about you. Essentially, you want the discussion forum to censor any mentions about your website because it so unfortunately doesn't improve your search engine rankings? WTF?!?

How out of your mind can you be?

Did you already write to The Guardian and New York Times and asked them to remove several articles, also from already published papers? I recommend you shut your frickin website if you don't like losing control who's linking and writing about you. Or move to China and start gaining reputation in The Party. I just cannot give better advise than if you are so out of understanding what Internet is, you shouldn't consider taking the task of search engine optimization.

OMG. So appalling a company with such a history seems to have lost contact with reality.

PS: the discussion was recommending the shop, but as a result I'll add information that the people running it might just be too strange to do business with..

In my shoes

2008-07-18T21:38:00.014+03:00

Disclaimer: I'm sorry dear readers - if there still are any - that I'm so much more inclined to venting about disasters than documenting the sunny side. Yes I am the merry-go-happy partygirl but it's so easy to move on with good things business as usual, and have a strong urge to get moody thoughts out. So, if partying is all you want, skip and look forward into reading next entry. Or take a drink or something.

My girlfriend from some time ago from other side of the world called me. She's got HIV she told, crying most of the time. I've gone to tests regularly so I'm sure I'm clear. I quite couldn't get if she just wanted to inform me and to talk with somebody who cares, or if there's something else. Anyway, my spouse (who knew the story already) got utterly mad at me for asking to send email and explain what has happened and what is her situation. Ex-relationships can die in hell pleading for help whatsoever if she can decide. Instant domestic crisis, just add reason for jealousy. Both parties happen to be from same Asian country. Yes I've told already I appreciate very much the chance to drink very deeply from the cup of life.

Not sure what to do, but if the story is true (sorry for scepticism but for all things counted, cannot be ruled out) it's hard to ignore. As a western wellfare bastard HIV is just a disease requiring regular medication, but for the less fortunate parts of the world it more or less means end of life, unless you happen to be part of the high society. Further crisis ahead. Looks like I haven't been blessed with normal life.

I'm not looking for a clearer conscience
Peace of mind after what I've been through
And before we talk of repentance
Try walking in my shoes
You'll stumble in my footsteps
Keep the same appointments I kept
If you try walking in my shoes
Try walking in my shoes

Depeche Mode: Walking in my shoes

112 is a joke

2008-07-11T03:06:00.009+03:00

Mmm.. I feel so lousy. I've enjoyed so much reading blogs about interesting characters like Karol and Becky, but I'm too lazy to report diligently about my whereabouts. I guess I would be occasionally capable to hit the front page..

Last weekend we had a Puuteri regatta. So what is Puuteri? It's my Finnish Angels-inspired transgender forum/chat site with currently about 350 users and 3.000 messages - in a language territory of 5 million people, after 9 months!
Anyhow, 2 girls from the forum wanted to arrange a regatta. The date was bad for me as my boat was not available but we decided to join with my newlywed wife on short notice. Now believe me, I'm no amateur to sea. And I'm no amateur to alcohol. OMG bad combination. We boarded Saija's fabulous boat and headed to sea in fair weather. After unsuccessfully trying to spot THE Finnish nude beach we waited at sea for the other yacht to join us. After joining we enjoyed some delights like my newly invented rhum-strawberry yoghurt - what landludders couldn't drink it, it was delicious! I went to swim (+16oC) and was intimated to numerous photographs on the occasion. Well we did have some decent delights like salmon sushi as well..
Next we headed to a nearby island for a picnic. To put a story short, we made barbeque, annoyed all other people and our captain got terribly, terribly drunk (i.e. lying down for half an hour trying to get back to boat). We managed to drag him onboard and hide from stares from neighboring yachts. It looked like I had to take command of the ship, so we first proceeded to home harbour to fetch my girlie stuff. Bringing it onboard I dropped into the sea. Hooray. Then I commanded the invincible armada to a pier located conveniently near to my favourite club DTM.
I marched my 7-something bandits into the bar (disregarding the 2 block queue - I'm a VIP hey?!?) and on with the party.. Oh we did help one homeless alcoholic into the caring hands of Finnish police forces, narrowly escaping ending up spending the night with the coppers ourselves as well..
Very very unfortunately a member of our party fell all his 150kg's on me, standing on my feet. My ankle twisted and gone in pain.

Where would I be without friends? They take care when everything else fails. 112 (or 911 for yanks) was refusing to send an ambulance, one tranny with destroyed leg is not a reason enough in Finland. Impossible to get taxi. My friend managed to catch a bike taxi. Fucking hell! I'm living in one of the most appraised developed country, paying 2.000€+ /month taxes and when my leg is destroyed I get to a hospital with a chance luck of finding a riksha! Ooh I spent some 3 hours of the Saturday night in the one and only Helsinki ER hospital. Got Xray, no broken bones so all I got was walking sticks. Welcome again to the wellfare society. Nothing, for fuck's sake. Wait 3 hours in hospital with terribly pain and all I get is walking sticks, as I've got no broken bones. Oh well.
Looking back, it was funny experience, sitting there in wheelchair for hours in fishnets and mini with all those bleeding ER patients.
I retreated to a friend's flat nearby to die slowly with pain. My ankle was totally destroyed and the pain I got was monumental. I ate painkillers like.. hares eat grass? My dear wife luckily has a driving licence, we gathered our things in the morning from the yacht and drove back home. All plans for my holiday destroyed.

So, a normal night out again.
This weekend ER, next weekend - what? (If I can walk already?)

Eve: Tambourine

Sparkles(s)

2008-06-27T17:03:00.003+03:00

I won't be at the Canal Street this weekend. Heart bleeding. Well, I'm missing many of you truly. Been about a year since I last saw any of my UK friends. Just too pressed with work and everything, in a positive way though.

Greetings from Amsterdam, I'll try to have all the fun I can to compensate the major loss. Have fun darlinks! <3 <3 <3

Catching up

2008-05-29T21:50:00.004+03:00

What I did last weekend?

Move lawn looking like Pussycat Dolls - check
Have Jap lolita ts-friends come over to my place - check
Have Chicks with Guns (tm) sauna evening with them - check
Organize t*girl meeting at nightclub & party all night - check
Attend moving family reunion - check
Organize forthcoming life with newlywed - check
Book 4*2 trips in Asia & Europe - check
Blog about all marvelous things happening around me - errr..
Post plenty of pictures on Flickr - what pictures?!?

Sorry but I just can't keep up with myself. Tomorrow I'm changing continent again.

Oh and by the way. I cannot make it to the Sparkle. I know already I'll be missing you all like hell, but that's life. 2009 is almost there! Love you all.

Poor Amy Winehouse: Valerie

Where Do I Begin?

2008-04-08T12:08:00.003+03:00

Greetings from Bangkok. Got married.

Shirley Bassey - LOVE STORY (Where Do I Begin)

Sometimes words fail.

When I come back I'll be signing a new job and start looking for a flat downtown, my newlywed's moving to Finland soon. And it all started on Christmas Day night..

Out with the old..

2008-03-20T21:39:00.003+02:00

Sorry for being cryptic as usual, but blame the Lithuanian waitresses who bring me new glass no matter what I say to them. Do they know I'm an alcoholic or are they just in urgent need of English lessons?

I'm feeling moody, this might be my last business trip in my professional life as it has been for several years. T-7 till MD-11 takes off and my life changes. And other things. Stay tuned if you're interested.

XOXO

Beloved: Sweet Harmony

Tamed

2008-02-23T13:58:00.003+02:00

In the city of sin and angels
where the devil always walks next to you
and the pearls ain't free
I fell for your tropical eyes
smile joy crazyness pure heart and goodness

Now I cannot get rid of this feeling
having lost a piece of my heart
craving to be complete
day and night

Vinylshakerz: One night in Bangkok / Iio: Is It Love

Restless heart

2008-02-23T13:33:00.005+02:00

I've been a bit down as in addition to last Saturday's episode I've had a very very bad infection taking me to hospital Sunday & Tuesday nights.. Things are much better now although the original reason and resulting effects remain still unknown. My advice: don't get terribly sick in Netherlands outside office hours. I have to wait until I get back to Finland to get proper examinations.

On more positive front all my things were found in the theater as I suspected. Should get my laptop tomorrow here in Amsterdam.

All this mess has resulted in some reflection and two resolutions: I stop a) drinking like an idiot and b) irresponsible (sex) life. (Well b) I did on New Year already but now it's official). There will always be more alcohol (and other substances) and sex partners than I can possible consume. Time to draw the line. Maybe it took so long getting adult but I feel my restless heart got tamed a little. And I've seen who really care for me and am grateful for that. Some big questions going around my head got answered as well and all this has helped to see what path I want to take.

I promise to be about as much fun but lot less dangerous to myself and surroundings :)

Today I'll go see the masterpieces at the Rijksmuseum and have dinner with customer instead of smoking weed and trannying around Rembrandtplein nightclubs. But I'll do that some other time ;)

Real Time

2008-02-16T14:12:00.015+02:00

I have been lazy blogger for a month again so let's do something new: real time blogging! It's a full course tranny night in Helsinki tonight again. I'm going to theater with a dozen other trannies and some spouses, then eat in a restaurant and continue to wee hours at Mama.

13.30 Checked in to hotel. I decided to get a hotel room for convenience. I don't have permanent base downtown and the hotel's optimally located opposite the theater and just some blocks away from DTM. Even I should be able to walk back even though it's gonna be freezing tonight! Winter finally arrived to Finland looks like. It was -12oC at home this morning.

14.15 Went to grab couple big macs, I'm dying. Yeah I do eat shit sometimes. Waiting for Tita who's due to arrive in an hour or something. If she manages to pack. Nice to have free wlan in hotel. Middle European hotels suck with their 20e/day internet "facilities". I hope I packed everything. As it's a proper theater night I'm gonna have my long black evening dress. Actually very same I had last fall at DWC Hauho meeting. Funny this is the 2nd time in my life I participate with DWC and I'm having exactly the same clothes. Did I forget to mention it's a DWC theater night? Well what the heck why not..

15.20 I've finally found perfect transport solution for girl gear: Bundeswehr military bag! Big enough to fit everything, long enough to fit thigh high-boots as well. And looks cool! No more plastic bag hell.

15.30 Finally Miss Nervous Bad Packer calls she arrived at lobby.. Here we go again..

15.45 Shopping ->

16.30 Back. Mmm... Magnum sparkling and salmiakkikossu. Alcohol, my favourite drink. Now going to bath. Elina the photographer wants to join us. Mai mii panhaa.

17.15 I'm wasted like a fish in a rhum barrel.. Now hot bath and cool sparkling!

1.39
Things are going pretty bad. 100-0 wasted, passed out 2 times, loads of stuff lost... we are now at hotel and call it a day. Maybe someone will tell me the details of the night tomorrow?
(This post is made by Titania, due Valerie`s wasted condition.)

11.17 Oops, I did it again. To sum up quickly I managed to lose my handbag again last night: credit card, driving licence, phone and camera gone again. I do hope I dropped them in the theater but unfortunately it's closed on Sundays. And I'm flying to NL in 4 hours. OMG. Play started at 19 but we managed to enter only for the second half as usual. The play, Le Cage Aux Folles, was ok (although I don't remember much). Then we went to eat in a restaurant, where I realised my missing items and got my night ruined. Very intelligently I went to walk around downtown looking for it - and then forgot what was the restaurant where we were.. What an episode. I tried to convince Tita to continue in dtm anyway but she decided to call it a night. Now I really really pray my handbag is in the theater.

Some positive news: I will get my stolen laptop back next week in Amsterdam.

Scarred

2008-01-15T17:44:00.000+02:00

Just advertising Cristal Snow's latest song. She's a Finnish drag queen turn singer/songwriter (maybe participating in the next Eurovision). I begin to like her more and more. Especially since in the miss drag queen contest afterparty she complimented my show and we were lying on top of each other kissing. I don't know but I was told so. I was slightly wasted, again.

Cristal Snow: Scarred

Supa supa.

Weather report

2008-01-10T16:16:00.001+02:00

Weather report for today: 40 degrees C temperature drop, sleet. What went wrong when Finnish climate was created?

Marsha: รักยังไม่ต้องการ

khityn khun teerak

Sawaddee pi mai!

2008-01-01T13:20:00.000+02:00

The year has changed and I wish a better, luckier, lovelier year for everybody, myself included ;)

I was supposed to be diving in the south already but I'm still in Bangkok ;) Who hates Bangkok hates life. Life is good.

I was in Amsterdam a few weeks ago and generated a chapter or two to my memoirs - again. Put it briefly went out partying in an outfit that got half the city whistling after me. Hooked up with a transvestite pro and her gay friend with whom we roamed the streets and clubs. Doing sex for money in Amsterdam's Red Light District - check. LOL wups now you know.. Unfortunately the long night ended with the bloody frickin idiot gay stealing my laptop. I haven't been writing about that trip as police was tracking him down and I handed my Valerie contact cards with my blog address to them. My Christmas present was news he was found and so was my laptop. Praise Amsterdam police and certain gorgeus long legged blonde Dutch in the forces whom I dutifully explained my whereabouts that night. Well not quite all LOL.. "If you want to recognize me from the surveillance cameras I'm the one with blonde hair, short leather mini (short enough to show my stayups) and high heel boots" - "The hotel security confirmed there was somebody who could have been a tranny" I take that as a compliment as they didn't clearly recognize it LOL. I was supposed to go to Clinic Fetish Party the night after but I got so freaked out by my stolen laptop that it killed all my party mood. Only parts were backed up so 5gigs of pictures, personal records, official records of some organizations I'm heading and my company bookkeeping lost! Yikes.. I'm so happy it was found, hopely I can recover most of the data as well.

Moral of the story: Don't trust Bulgarian people with questionable lifestyle, even though your best friends happen to be Bulgarian and Russian. The fact they are ph.d. might contribute more than their nationality.

The following week I was working in NL and got so frustrated with seemingly no advances in the investigation I went back to RLD try track the bitches down.. In between I decided to check the Casa Roso live sex show which is claimed to be "something you have to see once in your life" by respectable travel guides. I've never been to one so why not? Crowd mostly middle-aged Jap salarimen. The first show was just B-class striptease, next one a middle aged, overwheight "domina" show I wasn't even very interested in. Middle of the show she came down stage looking for partner from the audience. After unsuccessfully trying to have the salariman behind me she turned to me. Mistake. Now I've been on stages with thousands of people in audience and I've done striptease and unfortunately I'm a bit crazy whatever clothes, although it doesn't show until I do something ;) So there I was on Casa Rosso stage with 50 people watching.. I warned the girl I don't like hard spanking, and after a second one I slammed her back on her ass. Friendly, but firmly. I do have a hard time being a bottom you know. Mistake. The show stopped and this mountain of flesh nickname security literally threw me out of the place. Something to laugh at afterwards but I wasn't so happy at the moment. I pay to come to see bad shows, I'm asked to participate in it and when I slap a girl on her ass in a s/m show it's beyond limits? Get real..

Moral of the story: I really don't have to participate in everything I can, some things are just not worth it.

I did my pit stop record: two weeks in Belgium - Netherlands, 30 hours from touchdown to Bangkok takeoff, 12 hours at home. Oh and I was flying business Bangkok, free champagne all the way! ;) I had my TG alarm ringing loud all the way, I was 97% sure my fellow passanger on the row was a m2f TS going for SRS or FFS, but due to acute shyness and the Norwegian guy between us I held myself from the friendly line "You TS?"

There was some spice to this otherwise seemingly dull blog of my party escapades. Hope you still love me LOL.. I'll be back in couple of weeks.

Happy 2008!

I won't be crying

2007-12-11T17:53:00.002+02:00

I haven't loved anybody like I loved you
I haven't done everything I can to anybody else but you
Nobody hurt me like you
Did you realize my love died a little with your every blow?
That's why I won't be crying anymore for you

Have a Merry Christmas & Happy New Year, love you all.
I'll be soon off Europe, will be back in 2008.

Robbie Williams: Sexed Up

Emotional

2007-12-09T23:26:00.000+02:00

Can one feel emotional about an airport? Arriving today at Schiphol I felt. The place summarizes my trans-European freelance life, flying there about every month for the last two years. I started looking at the people coming and going, and felt odd universal love towards all of them. More so because all this might be changing. I've got an job offer for a steady work which presumably means less traveling and independence, but advantages should be considerable too.

Tough day, managed to catch only couple hours sleep last night as I was packing and preparing the house and it's lesser inhabitants for my absence.

I'll be shedding tears tonight as my relationship does seem to end in ruins anyway, no matter how much I've tried... Just how many times is it reasonable to break up a relationship so you can still call it a relationship?

World Hold On

PS: if somebody is in Amsterdam this Friday-Saturday with great plans or at least knows of great fun all contacts are appreciated!!

Appetizers

2007-12-07T21:42:00.000+02:00

I'm still very early in process of putting the shows into utube (read: haven't done anything) but here be appetizers! Somebody put online compilation vids that contains snippets of yours truly too:

Miss Drag Queen 08 contest
Part 1 : introduction @ 2.15, Madonna Fever @ 6.15
Part 2 : Gwen Stefani @ 6.20
(Part 3 : Award ceremony)

MDQ afterthoughts

2007-12-01T02:10:00.000+02:00

I mostly practised my show on the previous day. Late night I started thinking maybe I'm totally out of scope for the whole contest. Then I started browsing youtube for drag performances, and found this gem:
Drag Idol and then I knew I was doing the right thing, even though the judges will hate me ;) Love me or hate me, indeed. Hello international. Just wish I could dance just as good as her..

And as far as I understand, some UK/US irony is in the game: Lady Sovereign - Love Me Or Hate Me

PS: I should get the MDQ tape this weekend, just as I get my hands on video editing sw I will post my performance on youtube! Promise!

PS2: I swore I won't take part again, but if I did, how about this for a song? It contains a message ;)

BlingSpace

2007-11-15T21:13:00.000+02:00

I had a strong decision not ever make myself a MySpace profile because 1) anything that connects with Microsoft is Evil 2) MySpace is so unusable heap of bling and bad web that it's a natural wonder people are able to use it. Why it's so popular, heaven knows.

Today I've spent 2 hours aimlessly looking for people I know from real life or the net and considering adding them as friends. Why? I dunno. Maybe it's a domino effect of a friend inviting me to facebook, then creating Valerie facebook profile, then going back to old MySpace non-profile and thinking what the heck.. But it all seems a bit funny, it just seems to be a global, yet closed ego-boost sandbox where your worth is metered by how many friends you have. But for heavens sake, having Madonna as your "friend"?!? Oh yeah, so you call her for a quick chat when you're bored. It's all a bit ridiculous when it goes past real friends, or some intention of friendship.

Now everybody go and immediately add me as your friend or I will spank you! I feel so worthless with only 2 friends that I will disappear out of sheer shame.

www.myspace.com/missvaleries

By the way, all this Miss Valerie began over a year ago because all other reasonable .com domains were already taken. That I decided to do the Drag Queen contest was a later, funny coinsidence.

Mother

2007-11-14T01:22:00.000+02:00

Today I told my mother I took part in Miss Drag Queen contest. Neither of my parents know. Of anything. She laughed from all her heart, and told she just yesterday watched my childhood picure she has in frames, thinking how beautiful I look, so delicate facial features. Then she proceeded to tell me their local newspaper featured made-up males, and she was amazed how one of them really looked like Princess Diana, with makeup and hair. Oh how I wanted to show her my flickr pics and tell "Mama, I still look beautiful". But I decided to postpone it. More important things were on agenda today.

Snafu

2007-11-11T13:33:00.000+02:00

I finally managed to do it. I lost my handbag with camera, credit card, driving license and phone on Friday night. Got a bit too out of this world.. The phone is the worst, now I've lost virtually all of my contacts. No backups. So if you feel like belonging in my phone please send me your number..

And I'll have a rl test how to live without a phone and credit card.

Miss Drag Queen 08

2007-11-09T20:43:00.000+02:00

Not me ;) I'm happy, tired, still having fever, and heading downtown to Milla-tv's birthdy bash.

Just a quick note, I'll update this later with pictures, hopely some video too.

I'm quite happy with the show I put up, Madonna's Fever performance from the Girlie Show-tour and Gwen Stefani's What You Waiting For? from a live TV show performance. 1:1 with costumes and coreographies.

I've read there are three types of drag performances: humorous presentation of feminity - "man in dress", ridiculing of feminity or certain female personas, and respect of feminity. My things is the last one, I paid homage to Madonna & Gwen Stefani. It's the rarest type of drag, plus a dancing drag is real endangered species.

Judging was definitely poo. They were trying to imitate Idols format and were very negative, I didn't get a single positive comment.. There was a professional drag artist & dancer judge but he didn't realize what my shows were based on. The others, two minor tv-celebs were giving mostly some random critic..

Nice experience anyway. Time to move on.

Eve of the Grand Day

2007-11-07T23:26:00.000+02:00

Eep!

Tomorrow this time the Miss Drag Queen competition should be over. I've got fab costumes (sans a pair of shoes I have to find tomorrow) and nice coreographies. And +38oC fever. Ha! I'll be performing Madonna's Fever tomorrow, what irony!

Really, wish me luck that I find some inner energy to shine on the stage despite my physical condition. Hope I wont be too nervous to blackout all the coreographies and lyrics..

On a totally different note, there was a high school shooting in Helsinki neighbourhood today. 8 killed, 12 wounded by fellow extremist student. He had posted his intentions yesterday in YouTube video and earlier in blog and forum posts (now taken offline). Finland was supposed to be one of the safest countries in the world. Tomorrow will be national day of mourning. Sad, sad...

Winter time

2007-10-29T17:42:00.001+02:00

Europe, or parts of, switched Sunday 4 a.m. to winter time, one hour back. As my phone hadn't changed itself automatically, I set it manually. Obviously it had set itself one more hour back on arriving to Estonia last night, as the customer called me this morning asking where I am, everybody is already waiting for me. I was just planning to have breakfast. Haha. No breakfast today.

Are we perhaps getting a little too dependent on all those small devices that actually don't work as expected?

I'm staying at Domina City. Doesn't deliver what name promises ;) No bath either. Bummer.

PS: Way Out

2007-10-28T12:35:00.000+02:00

There's gonna be reporters, tv crews included in the Drag Queen contest, throughout practise runs to finals.

I've been thinking about coming out for long but it still makes me wonder. Basically none of my family and old time friends know. *shivers* Well I will invite at least my sister and couple of friends to watch. Also this blog will get some random, nontraditional audience..

What a way of coming out!?!

Again, wish me luck. I feel like a ski jumper who just let go from top of the slope. I can only try to do my best but I can't stop inevitable. Well I could pull out of the contest but I won't. This is some of the decisions I've made to live a happier life. Have peace inside. This is what I want to do.

Naturally I'm worried if I do it alone /
Who really cares cause it's you're life you never know it might be great /
Take a chance cause you might grow //
Life is short, you're capable //
What You Waiting For? /
(Take a chance you stupid ho) /
Like an echo pedal you're repeating yourself /
You know it all by heart why are you standing in one place? //
What You Waiting For?

It's all in the lyrics.

Gwen Stefani: What You Waiting For?

From A to B

2007-10-27T20:05:00.000+03:00

After consultancy gig in Central Europe I flew back home for 24-hour pit stop to do laundry and pack for next week in Baltics. Went to see Sherry Vine, a drag queen from N.Y. (claiming to be famous, but aren't they all?!?) straight from airport. She sang herself the songs, but otherwise the show was quite a bummer.

Tonight I'm missing my friend Becky's wedding in Kings Lynn, the world tranny headquarters. I just couldn't make the sidestep from NL to UK and back with my schedule :( I'm thinking about you babes, may your marriage be happy, long and joyful! <3 <3 <3

I'm preparing for the upcoming Miss Drag Queen contest on November 8th. Yay! I'm going full ahead aiming for the Vegas trip top prize ;) Wish me luck!

I had all my make up with my this week but didn't bother to open the case, I was just trying to catch up on my sleep debt. I've been thinking a lot of my life lately, where I want to lead it, and I think I have clearer path ahead.. Probably will have to take some dramatic decision to be able to move on. No, not relationship matters this time - I hope :D Like living here midst of elks and rabbits. My car's been semi-broken so I just drive it minimum and take a bus. This time when I came back the battery was dead! The last thing I need coming home.. Had to take a taxi and now figure out how to resurrect it next Friday. Life could be easier.. And I'm burning stacks of money for this manor life.

Infernal: Self Control

PS: I haven't drank any alcoholic bewerage for 2 weeks, and will not before the contest. And it feels quite nice. I'm on rehab lol.

Burn Baby Burn

2007-10-15T01:41:00.000+03:00

Ok I've been a lousy blogger again. But for reasons, really. I'm exhausted and busy. I'm working day'n'nite, traveling every week. I was going to take part in a certain competition but had to cancel that for aforementioned reasons. Next month my hotel-to-home ratio is 6 to 1... I'm writing this in a train heading to the next city, next hotel. Surprisingly, I'm in a desperate need of a proper holiday.

Then I've finally set up the long-thought project, "Angels Finland". Soon outta beta, Puuteri.org (that's Finnish for powder) is a forum for Finnish speaking transgendered people. Two weeks after setup it's almost 50 users, most of them active, with only word of mouth advertising. That's pretty damn good in a country of 5M people, looks like I was right there was a desperate need for moderated tranny forum. All due respect to the original inspiring UK Angels and the powers behind it Jo & Kim.

Karol's earlier late night inspired post, and especially April's comment put me thinking about my blogging too. Why bother if you're not going to be honest to 100% ? Well.. Sometimes this feels useless and I consider giving up but hopely without sounding posh I tell you: I have an agenda. I want to show potential Finnish trannies an option for shame and scorn. Trannying is about having fun - or can be if one chooses so. It's possible to go out head straight, dance your feet sore, get wasted and even find accepting partners. I tell you a secret: I have no competition in Finland. As far as I know I'm the only tranny blogger here. Anyone know better, tell me immediately!

Will I ever feel peace inside /
Will I some day feel complete /
Will there ever be easy life /
Will I run eternally?

Interlude

2007-09-19T15:35:00.000+03:00

While trying to catch up and provide some entertainment, I'll just mention some challenges with my blogging.

1. I'm too busy with my life. How boring, but true.
2. My trannying is more real than virtual. I mostly go out to bars and have fun, and then continue business as usual. It's also that after going a lot out the novelty of reporting wears off.
3. I don't see standard things worth reporting. Not that my idea of standard night out would be boring. And besides, honestly, sometimes I don't remeber what I did.

Take for example, we went with Titania, my love and her brother both Saturday and Sunday out. Sunday got pretty wild even the bar was half deserted. We went to have a pizza afterwards next door. Now I don't remember but I was kindly reminded that I put my knickers (which I took off in the bar already) to pizzeria's palm tree and tried to give the pizza burners my Valerie contact card. I'm not entirely sure if they took it.. (My miniskirt was rather short). I should have a reporter with me who could write funny stories what happens. Volunteers?

Back on track

2007-09-18T23:05:00.000+03:00

But how long? ;)

Ok, so this is called Trendy Discotheque. Nothing is worse than an empty disco where nothing happens so lets do something about it.

Couple weeks ago I was working in Tampere and hooked up finally with Timi Cica, a glam girl with some fabulous pictures in flickr. Tampere is TEH Manchester of Finland, 3rd largest industrial city with.. err.. quite not so high-flying atmosphere. There exist two lgbt clubs, namely Pink and old'n'rusty Mixei. I've never been to either of them, or out girly in Tampere.

So we met in my hotel, had some brief chat with sparkling and headed to Pink. Which, despite it's website information, was closed! Whoah! So we headed to Mixei, and entering the place I could imagine why. There were something like 5 middle-aged gays drinking beer. Err... Not maybe time for a major wasted dance show this time? Had fab night anyways chatting with Timi. Nice deviation from my standard girly night out: 1) I wasn't totally wasted 2) I was talking intelligently in good company 3) I didn't have hangover the morning after.

We agreed we'll try to have some proper party afterwards somewhere, but was nice to meet a new Finnish girl.

I'll try to do this more.

Trick or Truth

2007-09-05T17:25:00.000+03:00

Truth #1: I'm a lousy blogger.

Actually that has to do with a larger problem in my life, I haven't got time to do anything properly. Will cut down on activities, promise. More fun, less pain.

What else do you want to know?

It's just the hot summer

2007-08-13T21:05:00.000+03:00

I'm not dead you know.

Went out last Saturday. I have bought several different wigs during the Spring and finally decided to try my red hair. Milla Love wanted to trim it and did a fabulous job on it. I looked rather good with it, although I don't like it's very clear division of hair on top.. Will venture more into redheads, promise.

Anyhoo, there was some leather gay club meeting upstairs Dtm and I just couldn't resist playing with fire when I saw that cute and charismatic guy ;-) He was French which is my worst language so couldn't really communicate.

Had a ball with my bestest friends Milla-tv & Mila and naturally my fiance. Downed three bottles of sparkling, a number of vrb's and some shots - don't remember anything of the end of the night but I was reminded of some features the following day. Milla Love is a card-carrying member of the same club plus she had a porcelain long distance call and passed out half naked on floor. Again. No wonder everybody says we are made for each other. Actually we did have a reason for major party, it was exactly six months ago we met and had our first kiss in the same bar.

Funny, I think I'm starting to have a fan club in the place.

On the same lines as Becky, I've been feeling passive about blogging and flickr posting for a long time, trying to force myself keep my presence.. Nah. You know, after I've gathered a certain amount of wonderful friends, experienced things, it's so easy to just feel comfortable in the sandbox I've created and simply enjoy being. But I promise not start gathering moss, there will be things coming ;)

Happily ever after

2007-07-22T14:32:00.000+03:00

Guess I should update with the latest news: we're engaged and getting married with Milla.

I could write a novel or two on what has happened during the last six months. We have been through paradise to storms and back many times and still adore each other.

Je t'aime.

Christina Aguilera: Candyman

Tracing continues

2007-07-12T12:22:00.000+03:00

Frickin hell! My luggage was delivered to my London Hotel on Tuesday. Tough luck I left on Friday and they were well aware of that. Now Helsinki is waiting for Heathrow to bring them back. I've almost given up anyway.

We are capable of landing in Moon but not keeping track of a bag.

LND (Cry me a river)

2007-07-07T16:27:00.000+03:00

Came back from London last night. Heathrow was in state of chaos, I queued two hours for check-in and then security screening. Plane was one and half hours late. Well, luckily. Nobody still has any idea where my baggage is. All make up and most of jewellery gone. Lots of clothes and shoes. Gonna be fun filing the insurance claim.

Went on Wednesday with Karol & Todd to Two2Much club in Soho. As a boy, because it was impossible to get a wig & boobs working all the days in & out. Had lots of fun anyway, Karol is good company and a lovely person. Too much fun, as the following morning at work I was still quite properly drunk. OMG. I'll take some holiday in London dedicated for partying.

Thursday I saw Clarissa for a peaceful after work pint and Italian dinner - in a slightly more upmarket place than she had thought :)

Last two weeks - with all their twists and turns - showed me again how wonderful friends I have accumulated.

* * *

Life is letting me drink so deeply from its cup I have to be very grateful, but sometimes I pay a great price. Ironically, within a week's time I am now saying goodbye to all the three women I have really loved during the last years.. So much love, hopeless crying and trying come to an end.

Nelly Furtado: All good things (come to an end)

I'm off to sea for a while. That's a place where I have peace of mind.

City 7 a.m.

2007-07-02T14:28:00.000+03:00

Standing in hot shower this morning 7 a.m. I felt exhausted. I'm sick and tired of booking hotels and flights, rushing to planes, losing my baggage, wondering my Visa credit, going all the time to new places working with people I will never meet again. Coming back home to find a pile of bills overdue, mould in fridge and trying miserably to manage my other parts of life.

I just want to sleep late, sit on my country house stairs in sunshine with a fresh espresso, with my stupid but cute cats. Have nothing important to do but moving the lawn.

Maybe with someone. Time for decisions.

Fcuk

2007-07-02T00:05:00.000+03:00

I frickin' lost my baggage coming here. Now if I won't get it by Wednesday how on earth am I gonna go clubbing as Valerie?

Bloody awful of Finnair. The second time within a week they lost my baggage.

Helsinki airport was just madness, people going to holidays. Bloody tourists, they should have their own terminal. Actually, they should travel by bus. Or walk. Come to think of it, they should stay home. Had to bypass all the queues to just and just catch the plane.

I'm camping in The Chamberlain. Come here and let's have a party!

Broke up

2007-06-29T19:52:00.000+03:00

Is there anything more tearful than tranny love life?

*sigh*

Justin Timberlake: What Goes Around (Comes Back Around)

Based on a true story.

Destination LHR

2007-06-29T00:03:00.001+03:00

Who you gonna call when there's an emergency situation in London? I'll be flying there on Sunday afternoon for a 5 day job. Looking forward to having some girly fun too. Although after Sparkle I joined the Anonymous Alcoholic Trannies' Support Group. Again.

How many days per year you have to spend in UK to get citizenship? With my current rate I could cancel my Finnish one at least.

The week after I'm expecting to have a nordic surprise act in Helsinki. Stay tuned :)

Sparkle: Full report

2007-06-26T01:29:00.000+03:00

Went to Manchester. Got wasted. Had Fun. And oh, there were 1.000 other trannies too.

Seriously, finally got home. I will be so overwhelmed by work by next couple of days I'll write something later. Just big hugs to my friends old and new (you know my address, send me mail and I'll get in touch with you).

It was the wildest party in my life. And others agree.

6 am eternal

2007-06-24T07:42:00.000+03:00

Just got back to hotel. Tonight's party was *****. Period.

Mel C: I turn to you

Mid-term resurrection

2007-06-23T15:36:00.000+03:00

After lying hours in a (empty) bathtub I think I od'd yesterday with vodka red bull. and red wine. and whiskey. and champagne. Now that I'm coming to terms with my frickin head again I guess I better start preparing for tonight.

Was great to see everybody, have some chats and dancing. Tonight will be even better because I will try to remember what I do.

Sorry if I was a bitch. Unfortunately I am sometimes when I have too many. But I'm cute bitch. I love you all, really.

So let's go again!

Sparkle: The Arrival

2007-06-21T18:40:00.000+03:00

Arrived at The Place this morning. I was feeling a bit weak in the plane as I was quietly enjoying couple of drinks and chasing Milla with lawnmover the night before.
As usual we were hugely late at check in and Milla's baggage didn't arrive to Manchester. After bitching about it for one hour she got drunk, forgot about it and passed out. Now we are preparing for the night, probably going to survey the Village. Jo arrived too and we'll see soon..

Letters to the Management:

Dear Sir(s),

While I appreciate your spacious bathroom facilities with generous mirror, it is utterly annoying that the bathroom shelves are all inclined outwards. All the makeup continues to fall out.

Yours faithfully,
Brigadier Sir Charles Arthur Strong, Mrs.

P.S. I have never kissed the editor of the radio times.

Country Girl

2007-06-20T18:54:00.001+03:00

Country Girl is coming to town!

Primal Scream: Country Girl

Tranny Footprint

2007-06-15T22:04:00.000+03:00

My Tranny Footprint

I emit as much trannieness as:

everyone at Sparkle

Calculate your tranny footprint at BeckysWeb!

(Which is logically impossible, as I'm at Sparkle too!)

Besides being a wonderful person Becky is the sharpest pen in tranny blogosphere, and one of the original sources of my inspiration. I'll tell you about it. Later. Now I'm too busy going to sauna, drinking Cranberry Finlandia Vodka and doing my pre-Sparkle defuzz.

And this is not a warm up for next week, Bex, just an occasion to give you credit! :)

PS: Blogger auto language detection is nice, provided you're in your native territory. Couple of weeks ago in Istanbul was... err... interesting. That was the most Turkish I ever learnt.

Sparkle Countdown

2007-06-13T15:25:00.000+03:00

Hotel The Place - check
Tickets HEL-MAN - check
New pink camera - check

I haven't bought new clothes for ages so I'll have to check my inventory and see if I have to go shopping. On Thursday I'll hit Manchester with due Milla, neither of which have been to England before. We'll be staying at The Place until Monday, so should be a proper party do! Gosh I have been waiting for Sparkle! So nice to attend the mother of all tranny parties, the party that made me who I am. So nice to see all my English friends, and maybe meet some new. I feel like going to the class reunion after 10 years, a little nervous to see how my best friends have been doing lately, hoping everything would be as much fun as "back then".

I know. It will. Manchester, watch out :).

I didn't go out for two months until last weekend, longest break ever since I started going out. Which is not so long ago, honestly. Been just too busy and usually it's not lightweight partying what happens if I go out. To give you an impression, let's see what happened..

I prepared at my gfriend Milla's parent's place with her and her friend. We had quite a proper amount of drinks before calling a taxi to DTM. Entering the place standard bottle of sparkling, then some considerable amount of drinks and dancing. Lot of fun together. Where time stopped, gfriend Milla came and threw her strawberry margarita on my white clothes and ran away. She declared on phone we're divorced as she's not so important to me. I cried on her friend's shoulder and he took us to sleep at his friend's place. Rewind (based on 3rd party stories). While she was spending time with her friends I was dancing with other girls, and when she later found me I was sitting on a couch and a turkish taxi driver was trying to find his way into my panties. At that point I hardly even knew my name let alone the nationality or sex of my companion, but as Milla was in similar condition she drew conclusions in a nanosecond and reacted.

The next day I ended up walking through Helsinki with ladies' white (ex, changed mostly into the color of strawberry) capris and a borrowed t-shirt and nothing else (like shoes) to see Milla and get back normal. Half an hour of talking and everything was perfect again. Sat night we went to party again, I was in boy mode this time. Milla said all gays were drooling on me, and our dance show attracted the attention as usual.

Just a standard night out, again.

We love each other to bits and know we're made for each other, but both of us are temperamentic, sometimes frighteningly so.

"8.6.2007. I'm really happy for you! In addition that you look good on the dance floor you are a very nice person :) Regards, Sari"

I got this slip from a girl at DTM. Milla got similar one a moment before. It's so nice to feel accepted and loved by everyone. Sari, if you're ever reading this, thanks a lot.

Latest development

2007-05-31T17:46:00.000+03:00

Greetings from Europe's last frontier.

Eurovision 2007

2007-05-12T22:00:00.000+03:00

Welcome to the Eurovision 2007 HQ hosted by Valerie S & Lady Viola.

Helsinki is totally packed with people from all around Europe with huge downtown outdoors viewing arena in addition to the actual stage. Which is told to be spectacular.

Hah, Lordi's new video of their last year success. They really have capitalized their success businesswise I can tell.

Of the hosts, Jaana is moderate celebrity originating from tv quizes, Mikko is the most handsome Finnish young actor (and a singer a bit too).

Bosnia-Herzegovina starts with actually quite nice song featuring strange green river nymphs. But lacks all the cheekiness of a ESC success.

Spain's boyband kicks ass next. Rumours tell Viola's gay friends vote for them ;-)

Belarus with their version of Bond theme presented by the satin wearing doll boy. Doesn't impress much.

Oh the Finnish inserts with ice-swimming naked people are... well typical Finnish.

OMG Ireland?!? Woodstock and World Aid meets Eurovision Irish folk music carrying the message. Zero points.

Finland presented by the former fork lift driver, Idols winner Hanna Pakarinen. Leave Me Alone. Did somebody think it's Lordi again? Not bad, but I'm not fan of the song. Which is is also sidestep from Hanna's previous pop career. Viola 7 points, Valerie 2 points.

That wasn't an accident. Krisse is a famous tv-show host with her character always over-simple, over-enthusiastic, over-barbie teen princess.

Macedonia presents the shortest skirt so far. +2 points. One dancer has to be carried on stage. -1 points. Oh the singer had to be carried as well. What did they drink before the performance? Rakija?

Bloody hell! Why all the inserts are from Lapland, in winter, with strange people. I refuse to admit living in the same country!

Nice socialist march anthem from Slovenia. Why do I feel like Pet Shop Boys' Go West? :)

Unfortunately the slavic block will be voting each other, so winners are probably there. As most finalists. I actually bet on Russia as this years' winner..

Hungary's song has some strange lyrics but oh the girl can sing. But lacking all that ESC merry-go-round cheekiness again. You ask why did Lordi win then? Because they are funny trash, after all!

Greetings to the UK HQ :)

Lithuania with smooth love song. Why is it that half of the entrants this year are slow, melancholic love songs?!? I'm beginning to miss DJ Bobo. Well, not yet.

It's a pity my favourite Cyprus didn't make it to the finals.

Now I really refuse to admit belonging to the same nation as the inserts.

Greece with.. something very Greek. "Cheeky Girl" : +10 points. Not really. I hope they didn't pay for the guy who made the lyrics. Well the boy is making an effort. Proper ESC trash!

First-timer Georgia puts all passion and heritage of their Caucasus nation into three minutes of ESC stage time.

Sweden. Oh dear Sweden. Douze points to the lead singer. Song is a piece of shit. Unfortunately. I could vote for him anyway, just because of the feathers and make up. What an entertaining performance!

Pity Danish Drama Queen didn't make it either.

Oh Krisse...

France with yet another chanson d'amour.. Time for mid-break.. Oh they found some energy into the song. An audiovisual tour de France.

Popped open a cava.

Latvia with yeat another love song. Baltian men in tuxedos. Since when did they start talking Italian in Latvia?!?

So Russia is in da house. Very calculated sugababes copy. I liked Tatu, they were original and controversial. These girls are just cheap ripp-offs.. But knowing slavic population, enthusiasm in ESC and neighbourhood support they might win.

Thumbs up for Germany. Last year cowboys, now jazz. Next year, what? Song was great, but totally out of context I'm afraid.

Serbia. Larger than life slavic passion. How can you put so many heart-bleeding heavy words into a single song and still be able to sing it?

Ukraina with their drag humour. Speechless. Our favourite for a winner!!! How cheerful and gay can you get? This is what Europe needs! The economies will revive, peace will be settled at the Balkans!

What's wrong with UK? In Finnish it was introduced as "Flying the Fag" :) That would have been more interesting. Jo, Bex, Jane, I feel sorry for you.
"Would you ike to suck something during the landing?" OMG?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Romania had last year a niceish Italian pop, now it's children song in 6 languages.. I want to hear some Romanian some day. Do I have to go there?

Bulgarian shamanish percussion introduction to 80's techno song spiced with Turkish spice. Not as bad as it sounds.

And going to Turkey itself. OMG, Lady Viola removed her knickers. The sparkling bottle is only half way... Anyway, what was I saying.. Oh yes, Turkey. The number of blondes in the country never ceases to amaze me. The story is pretty simple but nice show. Material for top-3 I'm afraid.

Armenia. More Caucasus heritage. Do they have red trees in Armenia?

Natalia Barbu from Moldova rocks! She was the other of my original favourites. Didn't have time to adjust her trousers, though. She was much better in the original video. I vote for her anyway. Viola stopped posing and gives 8 points.

Oooh it's voting time! Run for your phone! Is somebody there, by the way?

My non-conformant bets: Russia, Moldova, Ukraina, Spain. (runners-up: Bulgaria, Slovenia, Georgia, Turkey)

So are you voting?

Apocalyptica is a group of Finnish hard rock cellists.. Original and high quality in it's own way, though not quite my taste. They were originally classical players who accidentaly found they were hugely popular playing Metallica. Their hair rotation is classic ;-)

If you didn't know that Finland is full of heavy metal bands.. Well, now you know. If you were wondering how Finns are like.. Well, now you know.

I'm joking.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

So here we go!

I know Serbia was one of pre favourites, but I didn't like them so I hope they won't hold their top position.

Oh the Greek speak Finnish too? I didn't know!

Hahaa! Ukraina is leading! I really hope they win :) :) :)

Arf! What can be done to get Serbia out of #1?

Thank you UK! The chance is living!

Which Macedonia killed. All disasters originate from the Balkans.

So the winner is overtly dramatic slavic pseudo-lesbian ballad from the Balkans. I'll continue finishing the sparkling and listen to my favourites from YouTube.

Good night and thank you for joining us tonight, Europe!

Over and out. Lady Viola passed out already.

- - - - - here be links - - - - -

Russia: Serebro, Song number one
Ukraine: Verka Serduchka, Lasha Tumbai
Bulgaria: Elitsa & Stoyan - Water
Moldova: Natalia Barbu, Fight
Cyprus: Evridiki, çomme ci comme ça

Destination Unknown

2007-04-26T15:32:00.000+03:00

Now that I'm safely back home, I can tell I forgot my passport home when I went to Netherlands. No problems. Hail Schengen! Looks like I'm traveling too much.. Sunday heading to Ireland. Anybody there, drop me a line.

Alex Gaudino ft. Crystal Waters: Destination Unknown

When dreams come true

2007-04-21T20:18:00.000+03:00

Remember when I promised to have an energized 2007? Well heck it's been just the first quarter and what a year it's been already.. Some other things I was dreaming of last autumn have realized too. What can one do when dreams come true? What should you do when you find your match? Live it to the max, if you ask me. Vado al massimo!

It's funny that the more happens and the crazier things get, the less I write or post pics about anything. Well poor you. I will try to write something. Unfortunately I'm saying that famous "I will try" too often nowadays as I'm just overwhelmed by many things in my life. Just recently I spent 3 hours at home in 2 week's time.. And that was my good night's sleep. Will head to airport tomorrow again.

I've been out practically every week. The pic above is from last Saturday. While drinking sparkling at DTM bar some girl took a photo of us and it got published in Papper, a swedish language urban youth magazine, in an article about sexual minorities and a special weekend they had last weekend. Somewhere in Flickr you can verify my 15cm skirt did flash my suspenders & fishnets rather generously. I got very very wasted and managed to destroy my brand new italian 4" heel boots - I lost one heel! Our danceshow with Milla (girlfriend) was again the attraction of the bar, I was told. Unfortunately I remember only parts the night. Oops, I did it again..

Jamelia - Beware of the Dog

I've always been a great fan of Depeche Mode, and this one's a cover with some kick-ass attitude.

Strange

2007-04-12T01:02:00.000+03:00

For a moment I thought somebody is actually reading this, but then I checked and all I'm getting are loads and loads of hits from Google image search for my Hello Kitty image. Oh why? Help me mighty Becky, thou who can investigate any mystery in the net.

Now I will continue sulking and not writing as nobody is reading anyway.

Update: Woohoo - I'm hit #25 for image search on "tranny", surrounded by pictures of blown up gearboxes. Could that be the solution?

But I will still sulk. Maybe.

Is this real?

2007-04-11T21:18:00.000+03:00

Greetings from Brussels.

I need a secretary.

My Visa card is damaged so it doesn't work properly and my mobile ceased working, presumably because I have forgotten to pay the bill. It's a surreal feeling to be abroad and have your phone switched off. I've had a mobile for over ten years already, always available and at hand. Hooray for internet now.

When I come home from my travels I have 10 kilos of post, throw half of it away and the rest somewhere else accumulating half a meter stacks of Things I Should React On. And how are you supposed to keep track of all the bills? And for gods sake, why doesn't the phone company send me a sms reminder? It's a phone company after all. Then I try to keep up with the tens of daily emails to organize several organizations and my private life which is rather multifaceted. And I hate routine work. Especially paying bills. Ok, I could do better, but I think I have a semi burn out as well. Working too much, partying too much and too many, sometimes tough things happening all the time.

I need a secretary. Keep your thumbs up I'll be able to return home.

Or then it's all a grand conspiracy and when I go to the airport the guys with black suits will come and you will never hear of me again.

Can't live without you

2007-04-06T12:55:00.000+03:00

Did I say trannying is pop, ages ago when Robbie released She's Madonna?

Basic Element: To You

God this has been playing on radio charts for weeks but I hadn't seen the video. Milla (gggfriend) says I'm like that... Err... Oh we are just like that. Except I'm not that big and hopely look a bit cuter.

Survival in Hostile Environment

2007-03-30T15:13:00.000+03:00

God Finnish TG scene suxx. It consists of extreme TS nutcases who have hijacked all the public internet forums, throwing their depressing hatred all around. Ridiculing trannies as roleplaying weirdo HPWs and attacking any other TS who's life is ok. Giving advice like "Have you tried suicide at least 3 times? No? Don't even dream about it" for poor young possible TSes asking about transitioning. Please go kill yourself. Then there are old trannies who don't go out because there's smoke and loud music in bars. Then there are young trannies who don't go out because they're too frightened and mostly post pictures of their bare ass to wanker forums. And then there are the HPWs, natch.

Okay, I know several lovely TSs. And some outgoing trannies. My fullhearted regards to you.

I've been trying to stay somewhat on fi radar, imagining maybe there exist young trannies needing an example. I think I will give up that idea. Bollocks.

I even played with the idea of making an Angels-like forum for Finnish TGs. Problem with current forums is they don't require registration and are full of anonymous lunatic TSs and tranny haters. Nobody was interested when I asked. Bollocks. Scrap that.

I will go out again and have a party after couple hours with my tranny friend Milla, my mindblowing girlfriend, several friends of theirs and we'll have loads of fun and meet interesting people. This time I might not be too wasted, even.

Looking forward to Sparkle. I have a dream and it's called Fook Mi.

Eurovision Countdown 2

2007-03-28T01:46:00.000+03:00

I'm professionally informed. My bet goes on:
çomme ci comme ça of Cyprus and
Natalie Barbu of Moldova

My special prize on Best Christina Aquilera/Maxi Jazz Imitation goes for
Poland. Beware of the Polish Plumber.

Or take a look at
most of them. Special sympathy goes to DJ Bobo of Swizerland and Denmark with I'm Your drama queen tonight.

Finland suxx with Hanna Pakarinen: Leave Me Alone, but I cannot symphatize more the 2nd Lovex: Anyone Anymore.

Remember I told you first.

Now I promised the mother of all parties anyone coming to Finland for Eurovision. My place being the HQ. So?

Scientific Experimentation

2007-03-16T18:27:00.000+02:00

Even though I haven't written anything for almost a month I have 15 daily readers? You must have gotten here accidentaly, hush, go away! ;)

Sometimes too much happens in life to have time to write about it. Or it's too personal. Or both.

To summarize, I've been out to town couple of times in between. The latest night got wilder than ever, I think I exceeded all my previous performances.. Then I was in Amsterdam, also some Valerie partying there. And the party was pretty hard, consider me trying to keep things sensible. Maybe I'll post some piccies and details later.

Now I'm suffering the mother of all influenzas, having +39C for the 4th day.

Update

2007-02-27T23:17:00.000+02:00

Destiny has a funny way
When it comes and takes all your cares away
I can't think of a single thing
Other than what a beautiful state I'm in

What on earth am I meant to do
In this crowded place there is only you
Was gonna leave now I have to stay
You have taken my breath away

Is the world still spinning around
I don't feel like I'm coming down

It's in your eyes
I can tell what you're thinking
My heart is sinking too
It's no surprise
I've been watching you lately
I want to make it with you

Kylie: It's in your eyes

There's no denial to that anymore. God I'm enchanted. But for a reason.

On other front, I was out with due Milla & Taina on Sat. People were staring ;-) And a gay friend of mine whom I've known for over 10 years came and tried to pick me up. A memorable moment, a reply to his compliments: "Hi ****, how you doing?" He hadn't recognized me. Got him off-balance, but he still tried to pick me up. "Yeah I know there exists trannies who are into women, but don't you like men just a little bit?"

Livin' La Vida Loca

2007-02-16T14:55:00.000+02:00

She'll make you take your clothes off and go dancing in the rain.
She'll make you live her crazy life but she'll take away your pain
like a bullet to your brain. Come On!

Whatever happened to my tranny rehab?

We went to see Dream Queens drag show on Wednesday with Milla. I had a date originating from a certain champagne party, how extraordinary! Ended up having the #1 night by far. Major show, imagine two crazy semi-pro dancers releasing the energy. Supernova. Lipstick all over the face. People staring. I mean I'm used to people wathing, but staring. They should get a life of their own instead of marveling others having one.

Then there was the show. Mostly driven by Cristal Snow. MDQ 2005 Johan looks pretty cute, I think I never saw her before. I remember they did Trendy Discotheque (I can consult how it should be done in case somebody intends to do it again!) - 'twas nice to hear my anthem anyway. Sorry Dream Queens, but I had much more interesting things at hand.

Oh and two other girls were trying to join the continuation party. What can you say when a girl comes (with her tongue in your ear most of the time) "I always get so horny when I see drag queens like you, can we come with my girlfriend with you and have sex?" Err.. Err.. "I'm so extremely sorry honey but tonight I'm fully booked." Besides, I'm not a drag queen.

I just might have met my match when it comes to dancing, partying and having fun. She's hot. And crazy. Hot and crazy.

Sharam: (My girl wants to) Party all the time

Boogie Nights

2007-02-13T00:42:00.000+02:00

Hope you ready

Are you ready, coz i am
said im ready to party yeah
grab your coat, get your key
coz whatever your drinkin'
its on me, its on me ohh

Stand if you want to
Stare if you want to
but i got to party
i need me a party
i came here to get ya
but i can't wait
to grab me a partner
and cut a rug up tonight

Booty Luv - Boogie 2Nite (Seamus Haji Big Love Remix)
Thanks Milla for link!

I might try to write something about Saturday. Later. Hopely before next party, otherwise forget it, I'm afraid.
Summary:
-We had new mops, I was a brunette. Blondes have more fun they say. I really don't know. Could even disagree. But I do feel more comfortable as a blonde.
-Milla was seriously seriously wasted when we went there, did some naughty things
-I worked to exceed that as soon as possible
-DJ's were really really energising the dancefloor
-We made a proper proper show
-We had fun fun fun
-Destroyed Milla's home liquor stock, Moet including
-With a proper continuation party
-..and the curtain falls on the details
-watch this space
-Trannies have more fun!

Amsterdam explained

2007-02-05T16:15:00.000+02:00

Ingredients for a good night out in Amsterdam:

1. Check out www.travestie.org and their good calendar on events and places. For hooking up with locals they have plenty of Dutch tranny profiles too, but if your Dutch is a little rusty, you're just out of luck.. Might try some international sites like tvchix or urna instead.
2. Go to Rembrantplein which seems to be the center of nightlife. Lellebel seems to be THE tranny place in town, so a good spot to start the night with drag queen bartenders and a mixed crowd.
3. Proceed to the neighbourhood LGBT & normal discos.
4. Drink, dance & have fun
5. If you're gonna walk back home, don't have too high heels and try to figure out where you're going. Amsterdam is by the way very safe city in my opinion.

So Valerie ventured into the Sin City night. Lots of fun. Unfortunately I managed to book a hotel that was on completely opposite side of city from Rembrandtplein. What the heck, the 24h public transport ticket (6,50e) is convenient. I was wondering beforehand a little the reactions I might make in a posh 5 star hotel but what the heck, I'm a hot confident chick, especially after a bottle of Shiraz. Walked through the tourist hell walking streets to catch a tram. No reactions at all. Took tram. Some older Dutch gentleman explained me something mysterious, but couldn't unfortunately speak English. Later I thought maybe I was sitting in elderly people's place or something.

I had tried to hook up with locals, but filtering out all nicks like pvc_sub_tranny_slut_in_bondage I was left with very few candidates. Why is it that trannies in Central Europe seem to be so much more into kinky action? Or is it just the ones that are in the net? Got prompt replies for my inquiries but unfortunately they couldn't make it. Thanks for the advices anyway!

After getting a little lost I found it into Lellebel. Wow. A bar the size half of my kitchen. With a quick glance the situation was like this (in the very very packed bar remember): drag barmaids (2 pieces), TVs (2 pieces), TSs (2 pieces), horny admirers (15 pieces). Very quickly ordered my VRB #1 and positioned myself next to The Other Tranny. While the turkish taxi driver behind me was probing my selection of knickers for the night, I befriended with the tranny and we found out we both like to dance and had similar plans for the night. Instant agreement of a night together. She was with a ggirl colleague who she went to pick up for a night out on town as a girl, never having been told her being a tranny. Cool. And the girl was totally cool and fun about this new revelation too.

So we went to You II LGBT club to have a good dance. Place was smallish but a proper bar/club agreed, half empty when we entered but got properly packed while we were dancing.

She wanted to continue the night in Club 80, but the queue was so apalling we retreated, and went to a club called Sinners. Despite the name it was just a normal (very hetero too) nightclub in two floors. Spent the rest of the night there. Walked back to hotel. What an idea.

Was fun. Will replay.

Did I tell you my favourite bling bling teen princess shop in Amsterdam had -70% sale?

Pink: U + UR hand

Chips n Mayo

2007-01-31T23:03:00.000+02:00

I'm teaching the Dutch my famous How To Build Your SOA Enterprise System In Three Days And Smoke Pot Rest Of The Week. My tranny radar is on. I could swear Siobhan is on the course. The hair and all.

I'm gonna have couple of free nights in Amsterdam, and I packed Valerie along just in case. (Yeah I'm on rehab but...) Any pointers where to go? My ***** hotel states dogs under knee height are welcome. How about trannies with less than knee height skirts?

Transpocalypse II

2007-01-28T17:04:00.000+02:00

Transpocalypse II - check.

I flew to Manchester on Friday, and it was mother of all snowstorms in Helsinki. Flight was delayed 2 hours, which is pretty remarkable. Snow isn't usually a problem in Finland, it's normal. Annoying thing was they packed the plane and cheerfully promised the flight won't be delayed, and what happens? We sat in the plane on the runway. Not even serving free drinks! Doh! Additionally I missed my train and arrived in Liverpool quite late in the evening.

Jo had checked into hotel earlier and scouted the area. We had a quick meal and prepared for the night. Went to check two places, Superstar Boudoir and Navy Bar. Both were pretty crammed, and although supposed to be LGBT places especially Boudoir's atmosphere was very straight. It has a drag queen on the door welcoming people but other than that I think we were the only trannies around. Looks like they don't have cloak rooms in Liverpool bars. Better leave jackets in the hotel tomorrow. Couple funny incidents in Navy Bar, while queueing to the ladies' a girl started looking and interviewing are we fellas? She went all excited that there were fellas in the ladies.. I got an offer for a 12 inch Brazilian but declined politely the opportunity.

Action started on Saturday. Powered by a Farmhouse breakfast we did some shopping and general walking around town. We went to sleep around 4 (poor Jo had to wake up 7.30 to feed the parking meter) and woke up moderately early so an afternoon recharge was on the agenda. Met Becky and Jane briefly at coffee as they arrived to town. Official program started at Lisbon bar with predrinks. We headed there with Clarissa who had just joined us for some hotel room warming up. I had worked most of the Finlandia vodka while preparing and was ready for take off. Or I think I had taken off already.. Our hotel and all downtown Liverpool had been transformed into a huge hen party disneyland. Trannies go pretty well with hen parties. The people arrived to Lisbon, we had a couple of drinks and chat before heading for the Chinese dinner. Dinner was nice, some 20 people around long table. Was nice to meet Pandora, Isobel, Chrissy, Penny, (Sophie and Jessica very briefly) and the friends and partners of those mentioned..

After the dinner we went to Navy Bar where the official party was supposed to continue. Place was so full it was difficult to move, and people wanted to check out something else. Ended up in some even more packed bar where it was impossible to dance. Don't remember the name but they had a drag queen DJ. Something like 2 am we called it a night (or did Jo decide again I had partied enough for the night?) and went back to hotel. According to photographic evidence I passed out in full gear, with an unfinished drink in my hand. Well, the next morning I learnt somebody had much more bizarre end of the night..

I'm in BA lounge killing time and trying to stay awake. The place is so deserted it's creepy. Becky's and Jo's blogs are blocked because they are categorized as pornography. You saucy minx.

I'm all ready for tranny rehab.

Hello Liverpool

2007-01-25T23:59:00.000+02:00

It's Transpocalypse II, and like Jo, I've packed. In my own way - see above.

Dallas Superstars: Fine Day

Anniversary

2007-01-21T16:24:00.000+02:00

Exactly one year ago I went out dressed first time. Yesterday was the anniversary party.

This time Milla came to my place to prepare. Arrived in Dtm at midnight and darn, no queue even at that time. When can we put our VIP cards into good use?

Check the pictures if you're interested in essentials of the night.. You know what? A lot in one year. If earlier I wouldn't have imagined I would be some day doing the things we do with Milla, now I feel I wouldn't have believed any tranny doing these things. Well, Karol Cross and April Angell, maybe ;-). I feel like Alice in Wonderland. How deep does the rabbit hole go?

While Milla was in illegal state I drove back and we had a movie incident on the motorway. All night had been a snowstorm and roads were extremely icy. Some Volvo driver decided to race us and sped up from 120km/h forward.. His car started swerving from side to side, spun several times on the motorway, slid sideways to ditch and neighbouring road and finally stopped with spinning. I anticipated his lose of control immediately, started braking, put hazards on and was ready to call 911 (well, 112 here) and run for Tranny First Aid in my high heel boots. But woah! What a lucky bastard. He didn't hit anything, didn't roll, and looks like nobody was hurt. The driver waved us that everything was ok and we continued back home. Wonder how his car managed it, though.

Hi Tak: Say Say Say

She's Madonna

2007-01-19T23:31:00.000+02:00

Ooh! Robbie Williams in drag in his latest vid!

Robbie interview + video

I bet there will be tons of commenting on this, but I'll just say my initial impression. I think it presents trannies somewhat positively. We are pop?!? Will we (finally) see an avalanche of wannabe-trannies, because it's so trendy?

I have always liked Robbie.

PS: Doesn't he look like Mira Dee?

Mother (and Dad, Uncle, Niece, Dog and Bicycle) of all Party Reports

2007-01-17T19:09:00.000+02:00

Well, a mere summary as usual..

1. Acclimatization

Whoever invented a three day cruise trip to Stockholm as 24h girls was a super idea? Me? Oh bugger. I had butterflies in my stomach entering the terminal, equipped with enough clothes to host a fashion show. I had already given up the idea of going from the very beginning as a girl. Helsinki-Stockholm cruise ships are well-known for teenagers getting wasted with tax free booze. How would two trannies fit there? In the end my presumptions proved to be wrong, ships were pretty relaxed, mostly older people and a lot of Russians. And besides, deep inside, I am a teenager wanting to get wasted on tax free booze. So we fit in perfectly..
Original plan included starting girlie life at dinner, but we escaped even that by taking the chance to eat at the fully booked a la carte - immediately, with no time to make up.

Stocked with a champagne and two whiskies from tax free we started making up in our luxury cabin. Couple Ave Marias and off we went to the night! First went to Perfumerie to buy new powder. Funny how 30e Dior has such a luxury feeling compared to my old 5e H&M one.. Makeup industry is magic!

Didn't make a riot there but almost: bunch of Russian teenagers entered the place and a guy said strastuite(hello!) behind me. I turned and replied him (I do speak some) and the guy and 3 girls froze and stared mouths open. Then they started smiling widely and making a lot of noise. We got compliments and everybody wanted to be photographed with us.
Please let me keep my theory that from behind they didn't identify us and thought we were Russians. Russian women dress and make up a lot more saucier than Finnish so it could be. And as Mila earlier reported, average Russians have never met any trans people and have very open minded and interested attitude when they meet one. Well our encounter was very positive for sure. Later the night we were always waving and shouting when we met the cutie Russian girls around the boat. Gave one girl my Valerie card so if you read this, hello, was very nice to meet you!!!

Next we went to check the atmosphere at show nightclub, ship's main venue. There were plenty of people watching the band and waiting for the midnight show. Place was dark so we were not getting much attention, only a couple long looks. Had some drinks and walking around, but pretty boring. Went walking around the boat but things were pretty quiet. Time for party so we ascended to the top deck disco. At first atmosphere seemed like stiff and not promising much for the night. Grabbed drinks and went sitting. We played with a mobile phone we had found a little earlier. Sent SMS to "Mom" telling "Mom, I've lost my mobile!!!" which caused her to call us very puzzled :) As there was some nice dance music coming I didn't bother about the atmosphere any more and we conquered the dance floor.
Ending up dancing there a couple hours. A bit trashed, we decided to retire to cabin before closing time as we had two more party nights ahead of us anyway.

I successfully recruited Milla to take some lingerie shots in the cabin. We were laughing that after posting those to flickr, trying to explain being a normal, heterosexual man is a futile effort. Strange what things are extremely funny wasted at 4 am. Like a pillow fight, which I tried to have but Milla passed out. It's not fun for long alone so I soon joined.

2. Global Warming

After a breakfast in cabin we had most chaotic dressing, making up and packing for Stockholm. Gosh I remembered one more thing I hate about cruise ships: they arrive in nonspeakable early hours, like 9 am, and then they try to throw you immediately out of the place. Trannies with hangover and beard, who just went to sleep couple hours earlier don't get mercy..

So we were out in Sweden in full girlie outlook! First time in normal situation, full daylight. Yay!

Took taxi from harbor to hotel and tried to book in. No luck, we were gonna wait for 3 hours for availability. Obviously time for sightseeing & shopping. Our hotel, Scandic Sergelplaza was optimally situated in the very heart of the city. Had a walk along Drottningsgatan to King's Castle, the standard Via Dolorosa of all hangover cruise guests. Weather was a bit harsh and we decided we were not so much into sightseeing after all, and went for a latte instead. Funny incident, a middle-East guy comes from the kitchen and wants to talk with us. He was extremely interested why we dress and are our boobs real.. Funny guy!

Did some shopping in small boutiques and found a nice dress. First time shopping and trying out clothes in normal shops! Yay! Walked to a lingerie shop Flirt Fashion Milla wanted to check out. Then I realized a must visit: H&M Stockholm! :) Shopping there until we almost really dropped. Well melted at least.

Back to hotel, and we decided an afternoon nap would be like putting money into bank. A bank where you debit on all these tranny nights. At hotel entrance the waiting taxi drivers that had gathered for a chat were whistling for us seriously.. A free ride tonight?

After that hard earned nap we called for room service, ate and had a bath (not together you silly!). And killed a Moet&Chandon. And started working with the two teenager whiskies. It was gonna be serious party time! We had wlan in the room so we uploaded some pics to flickr and tried to cause some stir in Finnish tranny chat.

We were going to Lino Club which has a very bling website claiming it to be the number #1 gay/lessie club in town. The place? Three smallish separate rooms with own bars and music. Beginning of the night was quiet but somewhere around 2 am it got packed. Didn't sight any trannies. Had couple of chats with Swedish guys, but it was almost remarkable how little interest we got from people. Could be because it was indeed gay/lessie club? Usually the craziest contacts I've had have been with bi and hetero girls who just ventured to LGBT world for fun.. Cannot help comparing the place to our home turf Dtm, and boy, are we lucky! It's a super place for having a party. Lino was ok but not much happening. So we stocked with drinks and danced the night away on the floor.

I had tried to get some Swedish tranny inside tips, but it had been a futile effort. Hallå Sweden? Where are all the trannies? There are not many in the net, a lot less who answer mail, and we met nobody in Stockholm. Judging from people's reactions trannies are not an everyday sight in Sweden either. My world is shaken. After all we Finns are convinced all Swedes are gay :) Ah the love and hate of neighbours..

Somehow we managed to get back to hotel 4 am, where we continued the party. We were so trashed we were mostly laughing at each other. Called for room service again but our order never materialized?! I swear I did give the room number right. Although I've no idea what I ordered.

3. Overheating

Waking up I didn't have to look in the mirror to tell that I still had my makeup on. Our lights had been effectively switched off. Lucky I found myself in the bed. And it was my bed. New day, new life. Bath with a whisky HOT, hotel breakfast NOT. Gosh I'm really getting alcoholic. Again we had to dress, make up and pack 'til 12 to check out. Chaotic, but routine. How come the desk clerk greeted us cheerfully "Yes I rememember you from yesterday" ?!?

Went walking out again, but our feet did not take us far. Sweden was embracing for extremely hard winter storm, and weather was accordingly. Saw an advertisement for a Thai buffet, which didn't require long negotiation. Spent couple of hours eating Swedish Thai buffet and drinking Thai beer. I tried to order in Thai but the waitress was out of business. Dunno if she was a Thai after all, although it's very common for Thais to be totally unable to understand foreigners, however perfect Thai they speak. Went then to a net cafe to surf with a latte. Tried to cause even more stir in Finnish tranny chat. Strange how the whole chat gets quiet after a couple of comments about our adventures... Well not strange, really. Too many wuzzies, if you ask me. If you tell them you've just rocked a Swedish nightclub, got totally, seriously wasted, went sightseeing and shopping and ask for advice how to spend the frickin' last 3 hangover hours waiting for the boat to leave, you have zero response.. Am I now earning a Bad Ass Tranny status?!?

So seriously, to hotel to have a final GT. Caught a taxi to terminal. With her hairstyle and big smile for trashed trannies, the taxi driver was definitely a lumberjack dyke. Didn't spot her chainsaw though. Into the boat and cabin checkin. I got a feeling It's happening again. Actually I like passed out recharged momentarily while Milla went to tax free.. Ordering more coke to go with the 12 y.o. Glenfiddich. Actually I think we had a nap again. You know, the hardest thing about being a 24/7 tranny is shaving. With normal beard growth, you have to clean up twice a day and shave to look acceptable. So errmm. After Milla provided the mixer we started destroying the rest of our stock. The Ultimate Party Tranny Test #2: how does your make up look like if you do it after respectable amount of refreshments? Dior Splash? (Dare you ask about Test #1?)

So we reproduced most of the first night's program: went to Night Club to see the midnight show, had drinks, got bored, went walking around ship - were hungry and went to eat some - and went to the top deck disco.

This time I didn't have any inhibitions, so went straight to bar, had some drinks and waited for good music. The bartenders were in the party immediately, couple of lovely lady ones. After a moment two Norwegian guys entered the place and locked on us like heat-seeking missiles. OMG. Got compliments all over, the other one grabbed my vodka red bull and tried to impress me with his drink-spinning skills which resulted in a vodka red bull suit and a tranny heading to dance floor. The other one was not so wasted and was actually rather sympathic, Milla was chatting long time with him while I was warming up the dance floor. I do think my performance caused the bartenders to have the time of their lives. At least the most fun that night. Hmm.. Especially over two promilles, I have a serious aspiration for dance floor domination... So we danced and I danced and we drinked and I danced. Grrr the evil DJ refused to play any Basshunter! It's cheesy but you cannot have a party in Sweden without Basshunter! And all of a sudden the place was closed. Nyt jo? Normipäivä! Went to eat again after disco closed. Rule number #1 of Better Mornings - don't pass out without eating. As it was our last night I totally refused to go to sleep, and kept playing music and drinking (and forcing Milla to drink, even she was trying to get sleep) the remains of our stock until 6 am ++.

Woke up two hours later to pack and exit to Normal Life. OMG. Well we did play with the idea of going straight to Dtm and continue the party. Realism won, (un?)fortunately.

This is a true story. Only one liver was harmed while writing this, two while realizing the scenes. Life and trannying should not be taken too seriously. I'm not taking particular pride in the amount of alcohol consumed, but that's the way I'm wired when it's party time. I'm Finnish, after all. We produce the world's best vodka and all citizens are required to take part in marketing. As I was joking with Milla, we should sell online webcast of our partying. Lot of action. Anyone subscribing?

Let me just remind you where it all began.. Pay TV: Trendy Discotheque
Swedish electroschlager!

Killing time

2007-01-14T15:22:00.000+02:00

Hälsningar från Stockholm. We're in internet cafe with Milla, killing the 3 hours before boat leaves back to Helsinki. Terrible hangover. Sweden is embracing to strong winter storm, people were told to stay indoors. Now hope our mops don't fly away.

I will try to tell more about the trip. Later. It ain't over yet!!!

You have been warned

2007-01-13T21:40:00.000+02:00

Stockholm Beware!!!

September: Satellites

You know Sweden?

2007-01-12T02:37:00.000+02:00

Welcome to Sweden!

Ok. The Finnish midsummer is just the same except we don't have the pole. We're dancing around the grill.