112 is a joke

Mmm.. I feel so lousy. I've enjoyed so much reading blogs about interesting characters like Karol and Becky, but I'm too lazy to report diligently about my whereabouts. I guess I would be occasionally capable to hit the front page..

Last weekend we had a Puuteri regatta. So what is Puuteri? It's my Finnish Angels-inspired transgender forum/chat site with currently about 350 users and 3.000 messages - in a language territory of 5 million people, after 9 months!
Anyhow, 2 girls from the forum wanted to arrange a regatta. The date was bad for me as my boat was not available but we decided to join with my newlywed wife on short notice. Now believe me, I'm no amateur to sea. And I'm no amateur to alcohol. OMG bad combination. We boarded Saija's fabulous boat and headed to sea in fair weather. After unsuccessfully trying to spot THE Finnish nude beach we waited at sea for the other yacht to join us. After joining we enjoyed some delights like my newly invented rhum-strawberry yoghurt - what landludders couldn't drink it, it was delicious! I went to swim (+16oC) and was intimated to numerous photographs on the occasion. Well we did have some decent delights like salmon sushi as well..
Next we headed to a nearby island for a picnic. To put a story short, we made barbeque, annoyed all other people and our captain got terribly, terribly drunk (i.e. lying down for half an hour trying to get back to boat). We managed to drag him onboard and hide from stares from neighboring yachts. It looked like I had to take command of the ship, so we first proceeded to home harbour to fetch my girlie stuff. Bringing it onboard I dropped into the sea. Hooray. Then I commanded the invincible armada to a pier located conveniently near to my favourite club DTM.
I marched my 7-something bandits into the bar (disregarding the 2 block queue - I'm a VIP hey?!?) and on with the party.. Oh we did help one homeless alcoholic into the caring hands of Finnish police forces, narrowly escaping ending up spending the night with the coppers ourselves as well..
Very very unfortunately a member of our party fell all his 150kg's on me, standing on my feet. My ankle twisted and gone in pain.

Where would I be without friends? They take care when everything else fails. 112 (or 911 for yanks) was refusing to send an ambulance, one tranny with destroyed leg is not a reason enough in Finland. Impossible to get taxi. My friend managed to catch a bike taxi. Fucking hell! I'm living in one of the most appraised developed country, paying 2.000€+ /month taxes and when my leg is destroyed I get to a hospital with a chance luck of finding a riksha! Ooh I spent some 3 hours of the Saturday night in the one and only Helsinki ER hospital. Got Xray, no broken bones so all I got was walking sticks. Welcome again to the wellfare society. Nothing, for fuck's sake. Wait 3 hours in hospital with terribly pain and all I get is walking sticks, as I've got no broken bones. Oh well.
Looking back, it was funny experience, sitting there in wheelchair for hours in fishnets and mini with all those bleeding ER patients.
I retreated to a friend's flat nearby to die slowly with pain. My ankle was totally destroyed and the pain I got was monumental. I ate painkillers like.. hares eat grass? My dear wife luckily has a driving licence, we gathered our things in the morning from the yacht and drove back home. All plans for my holiday destroyed.

So, a normal night out again.
This weekend ER, next weekend - what? (If I can walk already?)



Eve: Tambourine